Search Results for: porn addicts

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Why spying on your husband is a bad idea (and what to do instead)

“I used to dream that I would meet a prince But God Almighty, have you seen what’s happened since?” -Madame Thenardier, Les Miserables One of the things I dislike about most Disney princesses is that they sell a myth: that happily-ever-after is part and parcel of the wedding night. Sure, there’s…

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I Kept My Porn Struggle a Secret—Until My Wife Confessed First

“Everywhere”: temptation’s presence summed up in a single word. It is remarkable to me how humans thrive in our creative approaches to immorality. Before I was married and before I had ever heard of Covenant Eyes, I would find myself working creatively to hide what I prayed would remain hidden.…

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3 Biblical Strategies for Fighting Lust

“Don’t touch. Don’t taste. Don’t handle”. We hear these three “rules” often when learning how to fight—and overcome—lust. The problem is, mere rule-keeping does not itself get to the heart of lust. This is one of the great lessons Paul teaches in Scripture. Merely knowing the law only aggravates our lusts (Romans…

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What You Need to Know About Gaslighting

There I was, in the Food 4 Less parking lot, just sitting in my car. Bawling. I hadn’t known where else to go. I just knew I needed somewhere safe–somewhere my mind and heart could have space. I called my mom and relayed the most recent conversation with my husband.…

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Can you masturbate without lusting?

At first glance, the question, “Can you masturbate without lusting?” might seem odd. Same with the question, “Is masturbation without porn a sin?” For those who feel no guilt or shame about the matter, the question sounds ridiculous. For those who are utterly opposed to all masturbation, regardless of the…

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3 Ways to Break the Trigger of Boredom

What drives you to porn? What are the specific triggers that cause you to crave it? There may be a number of triggers. You’re hungry. You’re anrgy. You had a bad day at work. You’re feeling rejected. Or, simply, you’re bored. That last one is huge! One survey of a…

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Hungry for Porn or Just Hungry?

What in the world would make a fish go after a worm on a hook? Perhaps it’s because he’s just a total idiot. Or he’s a disgusting gluttonous pig who can’t control his desires. Maybe it’s because he’s evil.  Possibly it’s because he’s worthless and doesn’t even deserve to live at all.…

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Transparency: Tough But Always Worth It

Whether I care to admit it or not, porn is a big part of my life. It seems shameful, but that’s the reality I live in, for better or worse. I have learned many lessons through porn use and recovery, sure, but often at great cost. The Lesson of Integrity…

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Beyond the Superficial: 7 Principles from Proverbs About Friendship

It is often a problem, especially among men, that we don’t intentionally seek out good friendships. Often we don’t seek out wise counsel unless we are seeking “expert” advice. It is easier to stay on the surface with our so-called friends, and as such they are not friends who help…

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How a Little “Harmless” Entertainment Can Affect Your Husband

Numerous Christian men I’ve counseled have shared how their Christian wives read romance novels and watch movies and shows that contain nudity in front of them, even asking them to watch with them. Ironically, these men are trying their hardest to remain sexually pure for their wives, while their wives…