Here are two contrasting cultural beliefs for you to consider:
- Sex is the best thing on the planet
- Heaven is full of the best things we can imagine
So if both of these things are true, why does the Bible tell us there won’t be any sex in heaven?
No Sex in Heaven?
In Matthew 22:30, Jesus says, “At the resurrection people will neither marry nor be given in marriage; they will be like the angels in heaven.”
I’ve expounded elsewhere how God designed sex to happen within marriage only, so we can naturally deduce here, as the original listeners would have automatically, that if there is no marriage in heaven, there is also no sex.
No sex in heaven? Many might ask what the other options are at this point!
One of the reasons this news shocks us is because we view sex and heaven selfishly. Culturally, sex has become a selfish act of consumption. And our view of heaven is typically a place of self-centered utopia. We picture beaches and paradise and all the pleasure for ourselves that we can dream of, often not with much thought about God being around at all. This me-centered paradise is a great match for lots of sex for all of eternity. In fact, several of the main world religions promise this (maybe a clue that those religions were made up by a man? But I digress…)
But thank goodness that’s not what heaven, or sex, is meant to be according to the Bible.
Sex is a one-flesh relationship that bonds a man and a woman together in every way possible. It’s why this one-flesh relationship can only function healthily within marriage. The one-flesh bond includes full acceptance and commitment to all a person is, not simply their body parts (Gen. 2:24, Matt. 19:4-6, 1 Cor. 6:15-16). You are one flesh, at all times, in all ways, which can’t be undone.
This sounds pretty amazing, and deep, and night-and-day different from what our culture calls “sex” today. But there’s more. This sex and this one flesh don’t exist for their own end. They aren’t the destination, they are simply another sign post. A sign post pointing to where?
What Sex Really Points To
After giving a treatise on marriage and sex, Ephesians 5 concludes with the following:
“’For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.’ This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church” (Eph. 5:31-32).
Heyo! The whole time Paul was talking about husbands and wives and marriage and sex in Ephesians 5, it says here he was actually talking about Jesus and us! Marriage and sex are metaphors for the relationship we have with Jesus.
What is a metaphor? It is a sign post. It points to the real thing. It’s something tangible we can look at in order to understand something else. It’s a symbol we can learn from in order to understand and experience the real thing.
The real thing is the one-flesh relationship Jesus desires to have with each of us. It’s the relationship he has with those who call themselves Christians. It’s a relationship of intimate love and acceptance and support and trust, where Jesus is the groom and we are the bride. Earthly marriage and sex are symbols that can help point us toward the real thing.
This is why there is no sex in heaven. You don’t need sign posts when you’ve arrived at the destination!
It’d be like driving to Disney World and parking the car at the green highway sign with the white text of “DISNEY WORLD” and the white arrow pointing to the off ramp. Imagine parking your car there, taking a selfie with the family, and then driving home, telling everyone you’d been to Disney World!
The destination is always better than the sign post.
Heaven Is Not a Perpetual Fast
Some might disagree! But the reason for the disagreement is because we’ve been worshiping the sign post for far too long and we simply don’t have the full experience of the real thing yet. In talking of the perspective that heaven would be a “perpetual fast” from sex in the minds of some, C.S. Lewis had this to say:
“…or else of a perpetual fast. As regards the fast, I think our present outlook might be like that of a small boy who, on being told that the sexual act was the highest bodily pleasure, should immediately ask whether you ate chocolates at the same time. On receiving the answer no, he might regard absence of chocolates as the chief characteristic of sexuality. In vain would you tell him that the reason why lovers in their carnal raptures don’t bother about chocolates is that they have something better to think of. The boy knows chocolate: he does not know the positive thing that excludes it.
We are in the same position. We know the sexual life; we do not know, except in glimpses, the other thing which, in Heaven, will leave no room for it.”
-C.S. Lewis, as quoted in a 1947 Time Magazine article
A boy can’t understand if you try to tell him sex is the highest bodily pleasure, because he is convinced chocolate is and isn’t ready to understand sex. We can’t understand that pure intimacy with God in his direct presence is what makes heaven, Heaven, not that it’s some me-centered place where we eat Bons Bons on the beach, while watching Netflix, and of course, having sex. Nor can we fully grasp that intimacy with God is better than sex, both now and for all eternity. But the truth remains, which we are exhorted to believe and live by.
This is fantastic news. We worship sex on earth, but it’s also our place of deepest longing and brokenness. A single person feels unloved because they don’t have a sexual partner. A married person goes to pornography, an affair, or fantasy, because the sexual partner they do have isn’t satisfying them.
The Answer to Our Longing for Sex
The answer to our longing for sex is not sex! It’s intimacy with Jesus. We get to experience this intimacy on earth. This unconditional love where God adopts us as his sons and daughters and is well-pleased with us and we are fully accepted into his arms because of what Jesus did on the cross for us. But imagine this experience in a fully direct, physical way. Wow! That is heaven.
This gives us reason to not worship sex and it also reminds us we don’t need sex. Whether we experience the sign post or not is somewhat irrelevant. What is relevant is that we take God at his word that the destination will be much better, attuning all of our navigational tools toward that destination, not any metaphor, imitation, or sign post along the way.
Rai & Everyone Else
I also found this article, what do we think ?
https://catholicstand.com/will-there-be-sex-in-heaven/
Thank you for sharing the link to that article and first off Happy New Year everyone.
As we welcome a new year let us keep looking forward to A New World to Come under Christ Our Supreme Ruler, The Prince of Peace where there will be no more sorrow or tears.
Anyways back to the article you suggested. Professor Smith made some valid points on whether there will be sex on heaven or not but the most important thing on this matter Jeff is NOT whether humans agree with our beliefs and traditions BUT whether the SCRIPTURES support it. As we have learned in our previous exchanges, yes there will be sex or union in the NEW Age to Come for people will STILL be bearing children in the NEW Heavens and the NEW Earth as Isaiah foretold, (without the headaches of raising up children of course)
The SAME NEW Heavens and NEW Earth — (again NOTE that its ALSO a NEW EARTH) that the Apostle Peter spoke about that is PERFECT AND COMPLETE
That is why GOD said He will create NEW Heavens AND NEW Earth meaning He will NOT ONLY purge out the old HEAVENS (where Satan has access to GOD in accusing our brethren) BUT ALSO THE old Earth where wickedness rules
That is why there will not only be perfect spiritual (Heavens) blessings, bliss and happiness in the WORLD TO COME but ALSO physical and material (Earth) blessings and happiness as well.
But UNLIKE the present world we now know, the World to Come would be A PERFECT WORLD and not a mixture of good and evil, joy and sorrow BECAUSE Satan the devil and the fallen would no longer exist in that Age BUT only the SAVED ONES with their Savior AND KING for all eternity.
So yes, the WONDROUS BEAUTY AND GLORY OF World to Come is beyond our wildest imaginations and would be “MORE than we ask OR think” because its not just a perfect Utopia BUT A Golden Age.
A NEW Heavens AND A NEW Earth where RIGHTEOUSNESS Reigns. (2 Peter 3:13) where both The KING and His People will live a happy, harmonious and peaceful life forevermore
Lets all look forward to that Day.
Keith, I apologize , to you, Rai & Everyone else, hope this article is more on Topic
https://www.regenerationministries.org/earth-god-create-sex-powerful/
Rai , in your comment here of
June 30th , 2021 at 4:07 am you mentioned Profanity and
Curse Words , what is your opinion of this article
https://religionunplugged.com/news/2023/8/12/does-the-bible-prohibit-profanity
It mentions the F word which can also be used in a
Non-Sexual context , are certain words inherently sinful
Hope this isn’t too off topic
Hey Jeff, thanks for your comment but I do think this is a bit too off-topic. The main points that you, Rai, and others have made in response to this article are getting lost amidst all these other comments, so I recommend finding another forum where you can freely explore all these questions.
Blessings,
Keith
Rai, & Everyone Else , from a Biblical Perspective is there
really such a thing as “Love at first sight” ?
Another good article I found, https://dailycitizen.focusonthefamily.com/no-arnold-heaven-isnt-a-fantasy-its-real/
I found this article, https://www.desiringgod.org/articles/keep-them-from-sex
What do we think ?
Rai ? Hello ?
Hi Jeff
As A Response to your question dated November 9th
Do you think that Heaven and the New Earth will be a
Theocracy ?
Yes. I DO POSITIVELY AND AFFIRMATIVELY BELIEVE the New Heavens and the New Earth will be a Theocracy because GOD and The Lamb will be the Sovereign Ruler forever. This is the end or the culmination of all things as spoken of by the prophet Daniel on
7:27 (KJV)
“And the kingdom and dominion, and the greatness of the kingdom under the whole heaven, shall be given to the people of the saints of the most High, whose kingdom is an everlasting kingdom, and all dominions shall serve and obey him.” (Cp Revelation 11:15 & 20:6)
That’s why I’m a Theocrat Myself and I’m glad you asked the question but like Keith said, let’s stick to the topic.
If there are other questions UNRELATED to the subject here on this article that you have in mind, you can install and sign up on LINE and let’s continue our exchanges there, My friend.
Rai , Also
On the website defrostingwindows.wordpress.com an Article
Titled “Sex in Heaven? Is it Possible? Luke 20:27-39” posted on August 13, 2012
and also on the website defrostingwindows.wordpress.com an Article Titled
“So Much Anger Towards Holy Sex” posted on August 15, 2012
These articles no longer appear online, I tried looking on
web.archive.org , but it didn’t work
Can someone post links to those two original articles as
they appeared in 2012
That would be interesting if you can find that link again, Jay
Rai & Everyone Else , More about Sex and Marriage
Trying to stay on Topic
About the book
“The Sexuality of Jesus” by William E. Phipps
A person typed as a review of the book on Amazon.com and about
The Question of if Jesus was Married in his
Earthly Life
That
“The New Testament doesn’t say that Jesus had a wife. There’s no hint of a wife in the Gospels, the book of Acts, the writings of Paul, or anywhere.
No word of a wife of Jesus in places where we would surely expect to see such a mention if he had been married: Jesus’ call to his ministry; his discussion of marriage, divorce, and celibacy; his death on the cross; and his Resurrection. There are no references in the Gospels to a wife of Jesus.
Nor does Paul mention a wife of Jesus when it would have been helpful for him to do so. When Paul discusses the relationship between husbands and wives in 1 Corinthians 7, being able to cite the example of a married Jesus would have come in handy.
Likewise, it would have been useful to point to Jesus’ wife when Paul argues that he and his collaborators have the right to bring a Christian sister along on their missionary trips to help with temporalities. Paul certainly drew on the example of the other apostles who brought their wives to help (1 Cor. 9:5). Surely, if Jesus had been married, his example would have trumped that of Peter.
In Ephesians 5, we have the famous exhortation for spouses to model their relationships on the relationship between Jesus and his Bride—not a woman but the Church. It’s hard to understand why this analogy would have been used if Jesus had a wife.
The manifest absence of a wife continues in the book of Acts. It is true that there is no mention of Peter’s wife here either, but Luke had told his readers of Peter’s mother-in-law in his Gospel (Luke 4:38-39), so her existence was known. When Peter tells Jesus that he and the others have left their homes to follow him, Jesus says, “There is no man who has left house or wife or brothers or parents or children, for the sake of the kingdom of God, who will not receive manifold more in this time, and in the age to come eternal life” (Luke 18:29-30).
Jesus’ statement accounts for why we don’t see spouses of the apostles mentioned in the Gospels and in Acts: the apostles and their wives were separated for the sake of the apostolic ministry. Some apostles later took their wives along to assist them, as we have seen from Paul’s comments in 1 Corinthians 9:5.
Yet we have no similar mentions of Jesus separating himself from a wife as the apostles did, no mention of a wife assisting him during his ministry, and nothing about a wife continuing Jesus’ work in the early Church, as later the apostles’ wives seemed to have done. The Gospels mention the putative father, mother, and “brothers” and “sisters” of Jesus (actually kinsmen of Jesus, not “blood” brothers and sisters). They mention his hometown of Nazareth and the people’s response to him there. They mention how some of Jesus’ family thought he was out of his mind, at least at one point during his ministry. But we find nothing about a wife.
There is as much historical evidence for Jesus being married as there is for him being a professional surfer.” What do we think ?
Rai , I use a friend’s computer,
So it would be best to discuss and debate here
Others might find it interesting to read
What is your response to my Question of
October 19th, 2023 at 12:44pm , I was also wondering
About a Nice Big House all to myself with an Exact Duplicate of All
My Earthly Physical Posessions and Property in
BOTH the Intermediate Heaven Christians go to
when they ultimately pass away and in the
World to Come
Do you think that Heaven and the New Earth will be a
Theocracy ?
Hey guys, let’s keep the discussion in the comments here related to the article. Thank you!
Blessings,
Keith