When Porn Leads To Despair

For the enemy has pursued me,

crushing me to the ground,

making me live in darkness

like those long dead.

My spirit is weak within me;

my heart is overcome with dismay.

Psalm 143:3-4

Has your struggle with pornography overcome your heart with dismay?

For many, the ongoing battle against porn feels like a losing fight, and this can lead to anxiety, hopelessness, and even despair. This is particularly the case for Christians, who believe deeply that pornography is wrong, and yet find themselves unable to break free. Like King David in this psalm, feel pursued, crushed to the ground, and weak in spirit.

I recently received an email from a man who has been struggling with pornography for decades, and was convinced that God could no longer forgive his sin.

If you’ve experienced similar feelings of despair, I want to offer you hope.

You’re Not the Only One

One reason for despair is that we believe we’re the only one who struggles like we do. This is often the case when someone struggles in secret for many years, and lives in fear of being discovered.

If people knew the things that I looked at, they would despise me. Surely, I cannot be forgiven.

However, I can assure you right now, you are not the only one who struggles. The latest research from Barna tells us that 75% of Christian men and 40% of Christian women consume pornography.¹

More than that, the Bible shows clearly that the great saints of the past struggled just like we do. Psalm 143 gives a great example. David describes not only an assault from external foes but acknowledges his own unrighteousness before God.

Watching Porn Is Not the Unforgiveable Sin

This doesn’t excuse the problem. Watching porn is sin, period. Yet the promise of God remains, “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

See Will God Forgive me for watching bad things?

Remember King David. He was a man after God’s heart. But he committed adultery and murder and lied about it for a year. But he eventually confessed his sin. And despite facing dreadful consequences, God forgave him.

God can forgive you, just as He forgave David. All it takes is your confession.

But what if I’ve already confessed before?

I’ve heard this objection before: I’ve been struggling for years. I’ve continued to fall into the same sin. I’ve used up my options. God can’t forgive me anymore.

Some have even pointed to verses like Hebrews 10:26, “For if we deliberately go on sinning after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins.”

You see, I’ve kept sinning with porn. I know my heart, I know it’s deliberate. There can be no sacrifice to cover this sin.

I do not discount this warning, or the many others like it throughout the Bible. God’s Word doesn’t allow us to have a flippant or careless attitude about our sin. The Hebrews author is telling us that sin is out of character for the Christian. No matter if you are struggling, no matter if it’s an addiction—something about it doesn’t match the reality of who you are in Christ.

But the promise still remains: if we confess, God is faithful to forgive. And the fact of your sorrow over sin is evidence to God’s work in your heart.

You Can Have Freedom

Psalm 143 continues with a prayer for deliverance—and the hopeful expectation that God will do it. 10-11:

Teach me to do your will,

for you are my God.

May your gracious Spirit

lead me on level ground.

For your name’s sake, Lord,

let me live.

In your righteousness deliver me from trouble.

There’s a practical reality to this prayer. God’s will is for you to stop watching porn. And through His Spirit, and the tools that he makes available, you can do it.

Check out this article, How to Overcome Porn Addiction According to The Bible.

¹ Pure Desire Ministries, Beyond The Porn Phenomenon, Ventura CA: Barna Broup, 2024.