I’ve learned the hard way that pornography addiction will never be broken unless there’s genuine biblical repentance, and I’ve also learned the hard way that genuine biblical repentance always requires radical life changes. To break the chains of pornography addiction, I had to go beyond the never-ending cycle of sin-guilt-shame-sorrow-confession-rededication-repeat.
Many years ago, I began sincerely asking God, Christian counselors, and myself: “What do I need to change in my life to keep myself from committing this sin again?” With that question in the forefront of my mind, I’ve spent the last 10 years developing, editing, and striving to live what I call my personal purity battle plan.
That’s what you’re about to read, but before you read it, I need to make three things very clear …
- I’m not saying or implying that every Christian man needs to do everything that I do. This is my personal purity battle plan that fits my life with my specific struggles and history. Take from it whatever you feel will help you.
- I’m not saying or implying that this is the “silver bullet” that will make you and I porn-free for life. Believe me, I totally realize that without God’s Spirit empowering me, I’ve got nothing but words on a page!
- This is still a work in progress, just like me. Your feedback is welcomed and appreciated.
My Personal Purity Battle Plan
1. Every morning refocus, renew, refill, and realign with God’s Word (reading, studying, memorizing, meditating, or listening to a sermon). Remember, freedom follows fullness. Beholding the glory of God transforms a man. So I keep myself full on the Living Word and keep continually beholding Jesus Christ, the glory of God. (Hebrews 12:2; John 4:13-14; 2 Timothy 3:16; 1 Peter 2:2; Psalm 119:9-11; Colossians 1:16; 2 Corinthians 3:18; Ephesians 4:23-24)
2. Every morning review my Personal Purity Motivation. (Romans 12:2)
3. Every morning spend some time in prayer, recommitting myself to Christ as a living and holy sacrifice, and ask for His grace to live that this day. Without Him, I can’t do it! (Romans 12:1; Matthew 26:41; James 4:3; John 14:13-14)
4. Remind godly friends/mentors to pray for my personal purity and my continued victory over temptation/sin. (James 5:16; Matthew 18:19)
5. Never use the Internet without being monitored by Covenant Eyes Accountability Software. Make sure Covenant Eyes is monitoring all my Internet devices: home computer, work computer, iPhone, etc., and completely get rid of all apps that allow unmonitored Internet access. (Romans 13:14)
6. Never possess or listen to music that contains profanity, sexual content, innuendos, crude humor, etc. Make sure that all my music aligns with Philippians 4:8 or get rid of it.
7. Don’t buy, rent, or watch movies or TV shows that contain sexual content, nudity, or crude humor. They’re triggers for lust. (Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
8. Keep away from “fitness” type magazines. They always contain sexual articles, pictures, and advertisements. They’re also triggers for lust. (Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
9. Keep away from satellite radio. It contains some very inappropriate stations/content. (Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
10. Do not stay up late and watch TV when all alone. Go to bed when my wife goes to bed. (Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
11. Do not browse or preview any type of “adult” channels or movie titles on Pay-Per-View, Netflix, etc. Remember, it only takes a spark to ignite a forest fire! (Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
12. Bounce my eyes away from alluring images on billboards, magazine racks, etc. then quote a defense verse like Job 31:1 or 2 Timothy 2:22 or 1 Thessalonians 4:3.
13. Don’t talk or joke about sexually perverse things. This too has been a trigger. (Ephesians 4:29; 5:4)
14. Always look women in the eyes. If they’re dressed provocatively, get away as quickly as I can! Bounce my eyes away and quote a defense verse. (Job 31:1; Matthew 5:28)
15. Always conduct meetings with females (other than my wife or daughters) in a public place or have a third party present. Never meet alone with females! (1 Thessalonians 5:22)
16. Never flirt with females. Period. If they flirt with me, flee. (1 Thessalonians 5:22; Galatians 5:9)
17. Do not touch females other than my wife and daughters. Only a side hug is appropriate for other females. (1 Timothy 5:2)
18. Maintain honest weekly accountability with my accountability partners. Remember, accountability is absolutely pointless if I’m not going to be honest or if I’m going to be vague about my temptations, struggles, and failures. Remember to immediately contact my accountability partners when I’m in the moment of temptation! (Proverbs 27:17; 2 Timothy 2:22; Hebrews 10:24)
19. Notify my accountability partners in advance when I know I’m going to stay alone in a hotel room, and always have them check on me the next morning. As much as possible don’t travel alone. (Proverbs 27:17; 2 Timothy 2:22)
20. Every week keep myself interacting with, listening to, and watching godly men who are spiritually growing and impacting this world for Christ (mentoring meetings, phone conversations, listening to their podcasts, reading their books and biographies). Remember, I rise or fall to the level of men I surround myself with! (Proverbs 27:17; 2 Timothy 2:22; Hebrews 10:24)
21. When feeling very tempted, do the following …
- Look for the way of escape and completely flee the location where I’m being tempted. Get out of there—just like Joseph did. (1 Corinthians 10:13; Genesis 39:12)
- Immediately contact my accountability partners for support and prayer. Don’t try to fight alone. (Ecclesiastes 4:12)
- Quote Scripture Defense Verses out loud like 2 Timothy 2:22; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5; and Job 31:1.
- Out loud reclaim my new identity in Christ, reminding myself of who I now am in Him (New Creation, His Beloved, His Adopted Child, Ambassador of Christ, Temple of the Holy Spirit, etc.).
22. Continually identify anything in my life that causes/triggers me to sin, and completely amputate it out of my life. There must be separation from even the causes/triggers of sin. Remember, whatever causes/triggers me to sin, that thing to me is sin. Until I completely remove everything that causes me to sin, I cannot expect victory over sin! (Matthew 5:27-30; Romans 13:14; Galatians 5:9)
23. Keep myself well rested with adequate sleep and be especially on guard when I’m sick or spiritually rundown. During those times don’t isolate myself. Stay in Christian community. (1 Timothy 4:16)
24. Do not spend much time home alone. When I’m home alone and feel the slightest temptation, flee! Go to a public place (coffee shop, library, park, gym, church office, etc.). (1 Corinthians 10:13; Genesis 39:12; 2 Timothy 2:22)
25. Continually keep myself focused on the specific mission/purpose/calling that God has given me, and go fulfill it. (Matthew 5:13-16; Ezra 7:10; 1 Timothy 4:16
26. Often take time to enjoy the good pleasures that God has given me, like spending time with good friends, date nights with my wife, read a good book, watch a good movie, go kayaking or hiking or mountain biking, etc. Instead of focusing on all the “thou shalt nots,” enjoy the many good gifts my Heavenly Father has given me. (James 1:17)
27. Always remember, this is a one-day-at-a-time battle. Just focus on winning the battle today. Don’t worry about tomorrow. “Victory is won not in miles but in inches. Win a little now, hold your ground, and later win a little more.” – Louis L’Amour (Matthew 6:34)
28. Continually remind myself that in Christ, there is nothing I can do to make my Heavenly Father love me more, and nothing I have done to make Him love me less. Let that absolute truth motivate me to a life of holiness. (Romans 5:8; 8:37-39; Galatians 2:20)
Jason George is the Founder and President of Narrowtrail Ministries. He’s an itinerant evangelist and teacher who speaks at churches, camps, conferences, schools, etc. He and his wife have been married for over twenty years and have three children. Jason utilizes Covenant Eyes Accountability Software on all of his computers and his iPhone. Jason also produces a weekly podcast called, “THE GRIZ PODCAST,“and it’s all about helping boys become men and helping men become better men. It’s available on iTunes.
This is very useful to me as a teen mentor with teenagers (especially boys) battling with porn.
God bless you sir. More Grace.
I have been struggling with pornography since 3 years ago. This year I confessed this sin to God and to my pastor and we started together a process of repentance and restoration. When I read the list you posted I realized that I started to apply most of the steps you advise. For instance, I deactivated my twitter account permanently, because it offered a lot of sensitive material and it was easy to access to it. I’ve been porn-free for many months. It is not easy. I want that everyone who reads this comment, knows that It’s difficult, no matter if you’re a man or a woman. I’m a woman who was porn addicted, despite being raised as Christian since I was a child. I lost privileges to serve in my local church while being in the process of restoration, and the experience was so painful.
It’s also important to note in the list that we are not perfect. Sometimes we couldn’t go forward in the process, because we think God is going to help those who are clean or haven’t sinned as bad as us. But that’s not true. Jesus Christ came to this world to call sinners to repent from their evil ways. Remember that doctors do not treat people who are healthy.
We can’t be restored if we decide to walk alone. We need an accountability partner. And moreover, We need to depend on God completely. Being connected to Him, reading His word and obeying Him, no matter the cost.
Don’t give up. The race hasn’t finished yet and God will finish the perfect work He started in you.
Regards,
Diana
On number 19 I also make it a point to prepare for the battle when I am away. One way I have learned to do this is to write purity scriptures ahead on time on note cards and place them in my pocket. Learned that for Stephen Cervantes(40 days of Purity)… In the heat of battle pull them out and use them as weapon to help my mind refocus. In my past before going on this trips my mind would make plans on how to act out. Now I spend that time preparing to combat that instead of planing for it. Trips to prepare for can also be with your spouse such as trips to beach, pool, amusement parks…Prepare…Prepare…Prepare for success
Thanks so much for this list I am refreshing my daily battle plan because I have been slipping lately. This has been very helpful.
Joe, I understand your feelings, believe me ive had the same doubts that’s why sometimes i just succumbed to it, but now i decide to actually fight back since my ideas have always failed, the most ive gotten away was for 8 days, but i belive that ALL battles can be won it just takes time, my grandmother taught me this: “God is the clay master, and we are the clay, He will not stop till we are perfect, if we are a mess, then the clay master fixes it” Dont give up, we can fight this
I’ve just read your (Personal Pyrity Battle Plan #28), I am so blessed to have read this! To be able to have these verse’s at your side to combat the spiritual warfare that is ever present is the armour that we need to battle the evil one. I’ve been battling sexual lust for over 50 years! I finally submitted to Christ at the alter and confessed to my brothers in Christ of my battle with lust, and how I felt a heavy burden was lifted off my shoulders. My pastor told me about Covenant Eyes, so I’am doing the 40 days plan, what a blessing it has been. I know I have a long road ahead of me, but with support of my pastor and accountability partners and a loving wife and most of all having Jesus as my Lord and Savior. Go Bless You !!! Your Brother In Christ Lou.
Hello brothers and sisters. I love this article. I started reading a 40 Day plan on YouVersion and now I’m on Day 6. I am a Christian and I’m also currently recovering from Pornography and still battling it one day at a time. I would like to say thank you for the encouragement that you all provided here. I would like to ask something, what if you like all types of genres of music and u can’t just listen to one genre, would that still consider bad?? The reason why i asked is because i listen to Gospel, Christian Rap, Smooth/Contemporary Jazz, Oldies, old school hip hop, Rock, Country, blues and Zydeco. And i truly understand about hugging no other woman/man beside your wife/husband, but what if you have friends of the family and u in family that does hugs at greetings, would that be hard?? Again thank you all for everything, i will pray to our Lord & Savior that he will give us strength for our short comings. And you all be blessed.
I’m battling right there with ya brother!
I was around 8 to 9 years old when it all started when a cousin of mine told me to masturbate. Then 11 to 12 years went by to a point that I was already so into my lustful desires that nothing I had been watching could satisfy me anymore. I had seen enough to know I was very messed up in my head and soul. It was at 21 when I gave my life to Jesus and I can say it has not been easy but for everyone that that may see this that I write today, let me tell you- there is light at the end of the tunnel. what worked for me was Prayer, lots of Fasting, reading of the word and repeat again. I started reading the 40 day devotional, helping now a young boy from church and I’ve been happily married to my wife for 2 years and expecting our first child soon. God has better for all of us if we stay faithful to him. I encourage you and
Anyone out there you’re not alone and you will get out no matter how deep you may have fallen into this pit.
Blessings
Thank you, Jason, for this article !! I appreciate the wisdom that I can use as I struggle with pornography as well. I enjoyed that there were Bible verses with each point.
This article is intended for men but we need to remember that sin does not discriminate gender. Women struggle with pornography just as much as men do and we need to address it and not isolate women.
Until my addiction came to light I was always in the shame cycle. Trying to rebuild marriage and trust now. Thanks for all the info. God Bless!!
Thank you for this article it helps me lot and god bless you