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4 Steps to Overcoming Porn Addiction

Last Updated: February 19, 2014

Guest Author

Want to write for the Covenant Eyes blog? Share the story of your journey to freedom from pornography. Let us know how you overcame porn or how Covenant Eyes has made a difference in your life or the lives of those you love.

by DJ Wade-O

In part 1 of my “Dealing with Porn” series, I wrote about my previous addiction to pornography and how my wife found out. Like many of you, pornography was my little secret that I wouldn’t tell anyone about.  It was my way of releasing stress and tension, and in my mind, it wasn’t hurting anyone.

Overcoming Porn Addiction

How was it a sin if no one got hurt?  That faulty thinking was exposed once my secret was revealed.

How did I beat my addiction, though? In this post, I’d like to share with you four simple steps that I went through to fight and ultimately overcome my addiction to pornography.

1. I began my fight against porn by Getting Serious

The first thing I needed to do was admit what I was doing was wrong. In my heart, I knew I was in sin. But I always found a way to rationalize why I didn’t need to stop looking at porn on the Internet. I wish I could tell you that because I feared the Lord, I was able to arrive at this conclusion. While I do fear the Lord, my driving force for repentance was fueled by the amount of pain I was causing my wife. I knew I couldn’t continue to lead our family and do ministry with this still hanging over me.

I then repented to God and to my wife. I asked the Lord to forgive me and then I went to Belinda and told her I was going to seek help. I asked her to also forgive me and to pray for me as I entered this journey.  It wasn’t an easy conversation, but it was a great first step in repairing the trust that I had broken in our marriage.  It also helped that I told her I was now committed to cutting off any access to pornography (more on this later).

2. I strengthened my fight against porn by Getting Educated

After I became serious about overcoming my addiction to pornography, the next thing I did was educate myself about what was really causing this.  Even though I was serious about beating porn, I wasn’t ready to tell anyone outside of my wife.

I knew I needed help though.  I began searching online for resources to help me.  The first thing I read was an eBook by Mark Driscoll called “Porn Again-Christian.”  It helped me learn some of the things that caused my pornography addiction as well as re-enforce the need for me to become accountable to someone.  And while his resource isn’t big on accountability software, I knew after reading his eBook, that I needed some or else I’d just fall into Satan’s trap over and over again.

Read the rest of this post on WadeORadio.com

. . . .

DJ Wade-O is a New Jersey-based DJ, Radio Host/Producer and blogger who loves Jesus. He hosts a weekly podcast, The Wade-O Radio Show, that has been downloaded over a million times.   You can connect with Wade on Facebook or follow him on Twitter.

  • Comments on: 4 Steps to Overcoming Porn Addiction
    1. ben arispe on

      Thank you for this it’s encouraging to know I’m not the only one who struggles with this addiction. I had not ever heard of the covtenant eyes software but it is something I really need to put on my computer. It’s a hard lesson to learn and the accountability is something I really need. Thank you again so much for sharing!

      Reply
      • DJ Wade-O on

        No problem Ben. You can do it bro.

      • kirungi Pascal on

        am Pascal from Uganda.if you could put me in daily prayers brethren.because I hate the pornography in my head.i have tried my best to stop but all in vine

      • Matthew on

        i’ve been trying to fight my addiction for maybe… 3 years. It’s been off and on but it needs to stay off It needs to power down forever It’s ruining my mental health which is also affecting my life Sometimes I want the urges to go away so bad I feel like killing myself Please pray for me I’ll pray for the rest of you guys/girls

    2. DJ Wade-O on

      Thanks for sharing my testimony with your readers. For years I didn’t think I could overcome my addiction, but did thanks in large part to the power of the Holy Spirit and resources like Covenant Eyes. I pray that those who read this will be encouraged that they too can overcome this addiction.

      Reply
      • Elias on

        I really need some serious help I need to rid myself of this shameful and sinfully act

      • Chris McKenna on

        Hello, Elias – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. It’s hard to know what to suggest without knowing what you’ve tried. Breaking free from porn addiction is hard, hard work, so you do need to try certain things, like in the blog post. What have you tried in order to stop?

    3. Brian on

      Congratulations on finding your way through the darkness of pornography addiction. For more help with a step-by-step program, you may want to look into Power Over Pornography, a new book only available for Kindle. It’s working for a lot of people who’ve struggled with pornography addiction for years.

      Reply
      • Willie Jackson on

        Thxs

    4. Willie Jackson on

      Thxs

      Reply
    5. Stephanie c. on

      Women also struggle with porn!

      Reply
      • Kay Bruner on

        Yes, here’s a link to a number of resources specifically for women.

    6. lucky.mwansa@yahoo.co.uk on

      Thanks for sharing

      Reply
    7. Gary Jackson on

      Hello, my name is Gary and I’m not trying to make a special case out of myself but this has gotten much worse since I had my first seizure and started taking Dilantin. It’s an anti-seizure medication I have to take and I’ve learned through my own research that they are all mood enhancers and they all affect the memory along with the seizures. Not everybody is the same some long term memory some short term memory some complete memory! I think I know what started the pornography addiction, my first wife of ten years had sex with just about any and every man she could find and I was a long distance truck driver and would come home from trips at all hours of the day and walk in to see his wife doing things no man should have to see. Oddly enough these are the very things I seek to look at in the pornography world and yes of course I make fun of it like it’s just a joke.

      Reply
    8. Thomas Vanhaecht on

      Another book I definitely would recommend is your brain on porn. It will also help get convinced to start your nofap journey.

      Reply
    9. fundo on

      my goodness.am blessed sir with you testimony

      Reply
    10. Thank you on

      Hi my name is Sam and I have read your first steps to overcome p*** really interested and get rid of this out of my life it is becoming problem between me and my wife and I should never ever disrespect her in this way and I do need some help so I’m asking please help me to overcome this sinful and shameful Act.

      Reply
    11. Tony on

      Hae,Am Tony-Kenya,I have the same problem,, I try to leave it for, say a week,and when I meet any sex photo, say from whatsapp group.Am again tempted to go back….Am still a student, 2nd year university. I serve in the church,,,,this makes it even worse coz I fear to share it.Please, what can I do….. Help me!!!!!!! ¡

      Reply
      • Chris McKenna on

        Hi, Tony – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. If What’s App is the problem, then What’s App has to disappear! You can’t expect to beat the problem if you keep the problem in your pocket. I bet you already know this. This will sound difficult, but it’s meant to be loving and direct – no one can help you until you decide that you want to quit. Really want to quit. Even getting rid of What’s App. Then, afterwards, you’re in a spot of repentance and humility where the loving care of others can step in and help keep you accountable. The choice is yours.

        Chris

    12. Michael on

      I need help with porn addiction , watch it for hours,

      Reply
      • Michael on

        i Want to get save and give my life to jesus

      • Chris McKenna on

        Hi, Michael – I see you’ve commented on a number of our blogs, searching for help. What have you tried? Why can’t you stop? There are so many questions I would like to ask to best know how to help, but I’m really only interested in this one – do you really want to quit? Nothing will work unless you do. The advice in the blog post does work, but only if you want it to work.

        I wish you well.
        Chris

    13. Michael Williams on

      Want to treat people right and fair , want to stop thinking so much about naked wome , and porn every day.

      Reply
      • Corey Highsmith on

        I hear you Michael I’m praying for you

    14. Lelah on

      I’m a christian woman, aged 28.I have struggled with this shameful act for more than 20 years.
      There was a point when I stopped for almost 4 years then it started again. I keep going and coming back,truth is I hate sin and I don’t wan to keep swimming in this ocean of sins either.
      I love God and He gave me a singing ability to lead my church ,but evrytime I’m tempted to watch porns, I grieved the holy spirit and he walked away .
      Please I need help.

      Reply
      • Kay Bruner on

        Lelah, when you tell me that at age 28, you have been “struggling with shameful acts for more than 20 years,” it makes me suspect that you were exposed to porn or had other sexually abusive experiences at that early age. This can leave you with real scars that require real help and healing. Acting out sexually may very well be simply a symptom of those deeper issues that can be successfully addressed with good, competent therapy. I would encourage you to find a counselor who is licensed and experienced in sexual trauma.
        Peace,
        Kay

      • Phila on

        Pick up yourself again my sister, keep praying to God about it. Also avoid staying late at night… if you must it must be because you’re praying or reading your bible

    15. Evander Underwood on

      I been married for 4 years, and the whole time i have been married I have been watching porn on and off, i have told my wife and she has forgiven me so many times…but I go back and do it…and im afraid I will lose her if i dont stop, i thought here and there wont hurt anyone…but I was wrong and want to change my life and stop….need help

      Reply
      • Chris McKenna on

        Hello, at some point, it comes down to you and your resolve. No one can force you to stop looking at porn. This blog post provides 6 essential steps. If you’re really serious, then here is your roadmap! She’s worth it.

        May God give you grace. May grace guide your efforts. And, may your efforts succeed.

        Chris

    16. Marc on

      Hey all,

      My Name is Marc , I’ve also been battling with this sin for a long time. Since early childhood. Now a Adult really want to stop this behaviour. I still have a long way to go. Is there any other way in breaking it.

      Reply
      • Chris McKenna on

        Hi, this post lays out some really practical ways. I’m not sure if you come from a faith background, but don’t forget the power of the Holy Spirit to ignite our positive choices. Even for those who don’t believe, I think It’s there giving us strength.

    17. Ayok on

      I often need to use the internet to get study materials and almost everything. Whatsapp for online information dissemination etc
      Please How do I now avoid the same internet where this problem often come from

      Reply
      • Chris McKenna on

        Hi, Ayok – I think in your situation, having accountability and a very limit number of internet doorways would be helpful. Do you truly need Whatsapp to survive? Is that access as important as staying away from porn? And, maybe if you need Whatsapp, you’re only allowed to get access through the phone of another person. You’re smart enough to make some of those decisions. My point is simply to limit the opportunities for temptations as much as possible, until you’re strong enough to handle social media again.

        Chris

    18. Celia on

      Hello,
      i really need a help from getting over pornography addiction am not married yet but am struggling much on that thing i even tried to cutoff my whatsapp but whenever i get access to the internet and alone i don’t hesitate watching it please tell me what i can do even i tried not to have a smart phone but it doesn’t workout what can i do????

      Reply
      • Chris McKenna on

        Hi, unless you are willing to do whatever it takes to quit, like getting rid of a phone and Whatsapp, then it will keep coming back. There are steps in the blog post that can also help. I wish you the best.

        Chris

    19. Mercy espino on

      I struggle with shameful sin .I have tried to quit and I have failed.iam Christian I feel guilty coz I have betrayed God.I need help and prayers pls!!! Thank you!

      Reply
    20. Michael williams on

      I need to be save , want a renewed mind and heart, I am addicted to porn , xnxx and nude pics , I want to be rid of these porn , I could have sex and still look at it the next day, looking at women having sex, I want to commit, pray for me to get saved , I want this removed from me , my mind don’t operate the same. Pray for me .

      Reply
      • Dan Armstrong on

        We’re praying for you.

    21. Kay on

      i have have been fighting this addiction for years , since high school i have been addicted . i really want to stop and live a pure life , one which i don’t defy God’s holy temple .

      Reply

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