I can’t stop watching porn.
No really, I want to.
I have made promises and tried fresh starts in the New Year. I have even gone forward in church, gotten down on my knees, and begged God to help me stop watching it.
But I can’t quit porn! What is the real problem? Will I ever be able to stop watching porn? Because based on my past it seems impossible.
Porn addiction is an extremely complex issue with no simple answers or cookie-cutter solutions. But most people I talk with fall into what I call the “Zap Trap”—praying that God would just heal them or looking for some other instant solution. They want to stop watching porn without having to fight the fight for recovery.
However, in working with hundreds of men over the past ten years, I have learned that instant healing in this area is rare. So, let’s look at three main reasons why it is so hard to quit looking at porn.
3 Reasons It’s So Hard to Quit Porn
1. Porn is addictive.
Apart from the spiritual battle you are in by simply being a Christian, you are in a physical battle with a physical addiction that traps you into watching porn. You have literally become a drug addict. The drugs you are addicted to are those released in your brain when you become sexually aroused.
God designed those drugs as a wonderful part of His plan to bond a husband and wife as one during times of sexual intimacy. They all have a distinct purpose and are marvelously effective. However, your brain does not differentiate between having sex with your wife or having sex with porn. The same drugs are released with the same effect. Pleasure, focus, energy, release, and other things happen which make having an orgasm one of the most enjoyable things God has given to us.
We can’t quit porn because we like it. We like it a lot. So, we want it again and again. With that experience accessible in a five-minute trip to the bathroom with your smartphone, we start using it more frequently. When we get stressed. When we get angry. Or when we want to escape from problems, we can easily get a fix that does not fix anything.
Dopamine, testosterone, norepinephrine, oxytocin, and serotonin flood our brains, and we feel good for a while.1 Then shame and fear return, and it is not long before we want another escape, and it’s hard to escape porn when porn is your escape. Scientific research shows that porn warps the brain like any other substance.2
Those who can’t stop watching porn do not like it when I tell them they are drug addicts, but that is the truth. The drugs are between their ears. They don’t need a pusher. Their drugs are basically free of charge and are extremely effective. We can now access whatever things we want to view and get a quick fix within a few seconds.
Also, we can walk out of wherever we just acted out and seem fine to everybody. No hangover. No trace of what you have done unless you forget to delete your history. Breaking free from this addiction takes a lot of work, and most men are not ready to fight that battle. Especially due to reason number two.
See Why Is Porn So Addictive?: 4 Reasons It’s Tough To Resist.
2. We remain in isolation.
How many people know about your secret struggle? You can’t quit without telling someone about it, but you feel like you can’t tell anyone. Telling means risking your job, your friendships, your wife, and your family. People will drop dead in shock because everyone thinks you have it all together, and so that pressure keeps the truth buried deep in your darkest places. You feel trapped because you are in a prison of your own making.
I know this from experience. As a pastor for 26 years who struggled with sexual addiction for eight long years, I hated myself. I committed many sexual sins, and there was no way I could just say to my wife and my board, “By the way, I am addicted to sex.”
However, God in His mercy revealed my secret life and my recovery began in September 2005. Talk about a train wreck and painfully injuring my wife and our four adult kids.
See Understanding the Shame Cycle.
Remaining in isolation makes it seem impossible to stop. Recovery demands confession, disclosure, coming clean, and genuine repentance. If I had been a better and braver man I would have stepped forward and asked for help. But I lived in denial and minimized my actions by telling myself I knew enough to be able to stop watching pornography.
We like to say that a lone sheep is a dead sheep. If you remain in isolation, you are a dead man and won’t be able to break free. Porn has its hooks in deep, and you will need a team of people to help you pull the hooks out and stop watching porn.
To make it through a withdrawal period of about 90 days, you need people available to you on a constant basis. You need to learn how to reach out to them when the whole temptation process to watch porn begins. We like to say reach out before you reach in. Reach out to your team before you reach into your pants.
The opposite of isolation is community. Scripture has a lot to say about community and our ministry was founded on this passage in 1 John 1:
“This is the message we have heard from him and declare to you: God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin.”
Secular research conducted outside the church likewise underscores the vital importance of accountability:
- One study found that having an accountability partner can make you 95% more likely to accomplish your goal.
- Gallup Business found that accountability is a key component in employee engagement. Businesses with highly engaged—and highly accountable—employees reported up to 17% higher productivity, 21% higher profits, 10% higher customer satisfaction, and 59% lower turnover rates for employees.
- One study suggests that accountability can even help people treat one another more fairly.
Fellowship is community. It is being daily connected to other men to help you fight the battle. How many armies send their troops out alone to fight the enemy alone? None. Stupid question. So why are you trying to fight it alone? Lone sheep are dead sheep.
3. We don’t take it seriously.
It is so easy to say to yourself that everybody is doing it. It is not such a big deal. Are you kidding me? Porn use is destroying families and marriages at an alarming rate.
God says sexual sin is a big deal. He calls us to purity and holiness. He has started a good work in us and plans to finish that work but if we are walking in sexual sin like porn we grieve and stifle the Spirit within us and will continue to be pulled into deeper areas of sin.
Every Monday night, about 100 men gather at our church because their sexual sin has been and is ruining their lives. They cannot stop and are heading into very dangerous and dark waters. We lie to ourselves when we think that we can handle it. If you could handle it on your own, why are you reading this article?
Not only should we take it seriously because God does, but we should take it seriously because of the effects porn has on us and society.
Did you see the cover of Time on March 31, 2016? They found that Millennials who have used porn over the years are experiencing erectile dysfunction because they have trained their brains to see sex as something you do online. So, when it comes time to have a real relationship, they fail to answer the call.
Are you aware of the rise and prevalence of sex trafficking around the world?
We Need Daily Encouragement to Stop Watching Porn
I believe with all my heart that God’s Word holds the path to stop watching porn. He calls us to community with no condemnation. He wants all of us to be connected and truthful with one another (and Covenant Eyes can help with this). We need to do as James says. We need to confess our sins to one another and pray for each other, and then healing can begin to come. Lastly, we need encouragement. Look at this passage in Hebrews 3:
“See to it, brothers and sisters, that none of you has a sinful, unbelieving heart that turns away from the living God. But encourage one another daily, as long as it is called “Today,” so that none of you may be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness.”
We need encouragement every day or we will be hardened by sin’s deceitfulness. To start your journey, check out How to Quit Porn: 6 Essential Steps.
1 William Struthers, Wired for Intimacy: How Pornography Hijacks the Male Brain (Downers Grove: IVP Books, 2009).
2 Frederick Toates, “A motivation model of sex addiction – Relevance to the controversy over the concept,” Neuroscience & Biobehavioral Reviews, 142 (2022). https://doi.org/10.1016/j.neubiorev.2022.104872.
men who struggle with porn and ask to be healed need to also use their brains on how to rid it from their lives. remove computers, smartphones and all access to internet. do not go into gas stations that sell porn magazines. there’s options. and as you do this pray also for strength. porn has lead my husband to leave me twice. And even though I know in my heart he still does it, there’s nothing i can do. it dosnt matter how pretty or thin I get…he needs to choose.
Please pray for me as well. Contrary to what many people think, pornography addiction is also among women. I am an 18 year old female and I was exposed to pornography in the 5th grade. It was just a pop up but I made the mistake of continuing to watch. I’ll never forget. It was gutter.com. I am currently embarking on my first year of college and for the past year or two, I’ve been trying so hard to stop. I haven’t watched for a few months. At first it was so hard to stop because I would do it everyday for years. But I realized in my junior year of high school that I should stop. I didn’t even know that pornography was a sin! I literally just found out in July of this year. That really made me want to stop completely but it has been so hard and I don’t know what to do. I’ve been good for awhile but I’ve been going through hard times and depression so I just want to use it as a tool to help me or as an escape but I do not want to. I’ve been praying to god and I have always gone to church and I feel like how can I sit here praying to god and asking him to remove my pain and to restore my life to the happiness I used to have yet still have thoughts on watching porn? Last night I was feeling so horrible, I wanted to open up my computer and watch but I just forced myself to go to sleep and it has been so hard. Today I feel as if the urge is getting stronger and I just need help, guidance, and prayer to get through this because it’s so hard.
dont judge him we all have sined we dont like it either i am just 14 trying to recover i was a sttraight a student before porn
I have a problem. And desperately need someone’s help, but no one to turn to.
Hello, Salvador – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. Reaching out here was a great step. Covenant Eyes has great information and software, but if you don’t have someone you can talk to (Accountability), then can I recommend a forum like nofap.com? There are 1,000s of men who will understand your situation, no matter what it is.
Warmly,
Chris
You people are fanatical idiots. Porn watching is merely an effect of unsatisfied high libido. Clinical tests prove that a man has the need to ejaculate every 72 hours or so, and he does what he must to accomplish that average. It’s simple biology, not the Devil,. You people need to grow up and address the problems caused by your puritanical view of sex. Sex is not dirty, it is biologically necessary. If your man (or you) have too much porn in your lives, you just need to get or be a better sexual partner.
I believe in God, but I am sure he cares more about what is in your heart than how often you take off your pants.
Hi, can you please point me to the clinical tests you’re referring to? Thanks.
Chris
I am a woman who is Catholic Christian.
It has been like 4 days since I have looked at that filth ( as with me that and masturbation are linked).I want FULL COMPLETE DELIVERANCE from this n maybe a woman there can help me 4 free.
print it, read it and meditate on what it’s saying as soon as you get the urge
i dont even know what i gain from watching pornography.Its not nice,just a little fantasy,a virtual one for that matter.I need self control and wisdom on how to deal with this.Thanks for your article
I first watched porn at 12 or thirteen. It became a downward spiral day after day, year after year. Its one of the main reasons for my depression and suicide attempts. Its insane how difficult it is and how effect my life. I cant sleep until i masturbate some times. Its not as bad as it used to be but i still have a really hard time going two day without watching porn. The guilt and shame is destroying me because i know women should not be treated as objects like this. Pornography is a huge problem and needs to be dealt with but most people brush it off as if its nothing. Are society has been and always will be shaken to its core. The biggest thing to move past this addiction is to get help. Its nearly impossible to fight this on your own.
I feel guilty of watching and fornicating and even though I whole heartedly want to quit. For me it’s always been hidden up until recently the last 5 years I’ve met more people confessing they watch it to as a way to relieve themselves. Didn’t make me feel any better but didn’t make me feel like I was committing a sin, that was up until I would act inappropriately with myself and be so ashamed and everyday carrying that burden is hard. I never thought I would be so addicted to the sensation “the drug” that it became an everyday thing. I love the Lord and there are many devices in the world that can lead us to destruction and even though I’m still struggling and believing God that He will vindicate me from watching filthy porn, I must remember this too, “I can do all things through Christ which strengthens me”, and that The Lord will not put on more than what you can bare. I’m thankful for this forum, I needed this. Porn is a disgusting habit and I can and see myself being delivered from sinful thoughts of fornication and defiling this vessel. I thank God for my brothers and sisters keeping the faith and making it through these challenging times. We will get through it guys. Much love ✌
I Totally agree it’s either you or porn if he can’t choose, tell him to go. To many men are breaking women’s hearts by doing these disgusting acts with porn stars who are the hooks that baited them in salving and wrecking there lives.
It’s men weak wills I’ve no sympathy for them let them drown in the shit where they are trapped they seem to enjoy it better than you.
I completely understand you’ll be surprised how many women including myself have watched it for years. I’ve never spoke out about it because I was too ashamed and felt disgusting low and dirty. Today I realized I must confess with my mouth my sins. The enemy will try harder and harder each time and I can hear him whisper to me to do it. I need to fast and ask God to forgive me and to shut down all internet access. I am struggling hard but I will not be defeated. This is my first step in changing my life for the better. I ask that you’ll pray for me and all others dealing with the same huge issue. Thank you. Lord I confess my sins that I have watched lesbian and regular porn for years I’m tired of being a prisoner with no one to talk to about this issue and I’m tired of letting you down. I will from this day forward do my best to try harder and harder to not watch and to fill my time with positive activities. Lord forgive me, in Jesus name AMEN
To be completely honest, porn is no better or worse than emotional eating disorders, alcoholism, drug addiction, excessive laziness or any other extreme behavioral or substance abuse disorder people resort to when dealing with anxiety, depression and that empty emotional void we all have. God doesn’t say that quitting porn is a requirement to be his child and to enter heaven. God also doesn’t sit around sensationalizing certain sins over other sins with a scorecard like we humans often do. Even if you’re a pastor struggling with a porn addiction and it finally comes out, it’s not like you’re any more of a sinner just because everyone else knows about it now. Who are these holier than thou people who are supposed to be our family members and church body to stand up and judge or sensationalize the addiction like they’re sins, addictions and problems are far less severe. I have been a Christian since 1979 and porn has been an off and on activity since I was first exposed to it in 1984 as a 13 year old. I owned mags and videos for nearly 20 years as an adult and occasionally viewed them. I don’t own it anymore because I grew up and threw it away. I occasionally look at internet porn and masturbate. It sometimes seems like a ridiculous thing to do. The release is relaxing and provides a little chemical feel good for a while. This is the same feel good sensation I had when I naturally started masturbating at 12 years old before I ever saw porn, which leads me to believe that masturbation is normal for most people… to explore their bodies and sexuality… It’s a personal and normal experience. If a Christian is excessive and has a tendency to feed addictions to the point they can’t control porn viewing and masturbation, and it’s obvious that the person’s life, safety or health is at risk, then the person should simply find help to work through it and understand that it doesn’t mean their salvation is at risk or that God doesn’t love them… it’s just like anything else we go get help for. Perhaps churches needed to stop judging so strongly so people won’t isolate. I lead in my church and nothing that could come out would be that much of a shock. Why did people think you were some sort of perfect Christian on a pedestal in the first place just because you were a pastor… Perhaps idolatry and exalting humans needs to stop. I know it’s shocking to prideful, hateful Christians that a person addicted to porn can be highly successful at home and work, love like no other and still pray and stay connected with Jesus while committing no crime but oh his poor spouse and family… how betrayed they must feel. Imagine the pain the person is suffering. I’m being sarcastic because in my experience, most Christians are legalistic, judgmental and dishonest. They have no clue what true spiritual obedience and discipline are in their personal lives and they can’t even describe what grace looks like when others fall short.
I know I am doing bad things lord.
Please,please forgive me
I know I am selfish
I know I cannot stop bad things
But please give me a chance to say sorry
I have been asking your forgiveness for a lot of times saying please forgive me
Lord our mighty God,please forgive me just 1 more time.
Lord I believe you have sent Jesus Christ to die before us.
Lord, please forgive me for doing bad things
I admit I am a sinner.
Good thing god isn’t real
Pray for me
😔😔😔
I dont underswtand why married men watch porn UNLESS their wife stopped caring for them.This has happened to me I watched porn because my live in girlfriend and mother of my children would decide when she wanted to be intimate with me.Not just sex but just hold caressing loviing huggin kissing I longed for that and I felt so alone thats when I would turn to porn and it would remind me of times we were intimate.I miss being held loved its not the sex its the intimacy,but being alone with out physical touch makes me watch it until im satisfied and guilty.I feel guilty because I feel like ive used the girls in the videos.its a vicious sad cycel and hard to stop when you have no one at all.Male friends are not enough I miss romance with a woman so I stray.
Men watch porn because they want to. Loving, caring wives who give their husbands plenty of sex have husbands who choose to look at porn. This is not a woman’s fault. This is a man’s choice. Simple as that. If you miss the romance with your partner, then invest in the relationship. Stop watching porn and invest in the relationship. That is the healthy choice you could make to meet your needs appropriately. It is not okay to blame your partner for your unhealthy choices, however.
Hi! I am new to covenant eyes, and I asked my husband to help me, because I am the one who struggles with sexual temptation in our marriage. I realize and agree that it is sin, and I genuinely want to change. God has blessed me with a wonderful husband who has chosen to respond in mercy rather than judgment towards me. I feel very sad when I read comments from other women who have no mercy towards their husbands, no compassion or understanding. They even encourage other women to leave their husbands if they struggle with porn addiction. I realize it is hurtful, and it is a sin against one’s spouse. However, isn’t the relationship and the marriage worth both people putting in the effort?
Of course the relationship and marriage are worth both people putting in the effort. However, when the other person is not putting in the effort, when the other person is breaking their marriage vows and refuses to do their work, there comes a time to recognize reality and set up healthy boundaries. Here, here, and here are some articles on boundaries that may be useful to think through. None of us are required to be the victim of another person’s unrepentant, ongoing sin. We get to decide what is healthy for us, each in the context of our own relationship.
My name id alana im 35 years old and i been with my fiance for 4 years and he is addicted to porn. He does it so much it hurts me. Im against porn, always have been. Pornnis not a need its a want, they are so attractive to othrr females and body language. I am a beautiful thi. Girl and i dont know why my man thinks its ok for him to alway watch it, but the way he watches it he is sneaky about it. Sure enough i found an account he made of a female acting to be that person just to talk to other females and get sexual relations from them like videos or pics. He has hidden so much thjngs from me . He even says im the problem not him. I need to get over that every man watches porn.i need help i dont know what to do can someone help me.
Hey Alana,
Well, it sounds like HE is the person who needs help, because he’s not able to take responsibility for his own choices but rather blames you for them.
I think what you need is good boundaries. The essence of boundaries is that you identify what is okay and what is not okay with you, and then you choose how you want to deal with what is not okay with you. It sounds like hiding things and blaming you for them is not okay with you. So the question simply becomes: how do you choose to deal with that? Here, here, and here are some articles that can help you think about your boundaries and what is okay with you.
You might want to find a therapist who can support you in your boundaries, and you might also appreciate the online resources at Bloom for Women.
Peace,
Kay
I started watching porn about a year ago and I heard about porn addictions before but I thought how can you get addicted to porn? I found out the hard way and now I can’t stop watching porn and I get excited before watching it but I feel remorse and sorrow and deep pain in me after watching it. I don’t know if I’ll start to have suicidal thoughts but I desperately need help before this addiction eats me alive.
Wowww it must be hard I’m not married but I’ve been in a relationship before and I can tell how hard it must be for you …. but no matter what be there for him and yes do look good on the physical side… look sexy and don’t lay with him until you know for sure he has chosen God and you over it …. trust me … I’m a guy and I know better I guess from a man’s point of view …. make him beg for you …. but only reward him with a kiss or so and tell him why so or why not !!!
Cheers !
My name is Ire
I got exposed to pornography at the age of 9 or thereabout accidentally through my older brother ,sadly my curiousitt led me into wanting to know more about it,the details and try to understand what is enjoyed by watching, I’d on the generator and play the video in the absence of my brother and family… That was the beginning of mY Room
As whatever pornography video I come across ,I’ll check the website and go search it on the internet and watch more ..It was really intense,as being in my room alone while my sister in the university only gave me enough room and convenience to keep dwelling on the sin .
With time I stopped, I’d feel filty or I’d begin to have headache or feel sick I think this priord to the end of me watching porn that year…Years after Masturbation came into themany mix..I’ve really been there and done so many sexual sins I feel really ashamed of,I’m like a friend that has no worries and doesn’t live a terrible life..Noone knows what I got through on the inside,I feel filthy,bad , irritated whenever I masturbate or watch porn..I really don’t know,I wish I could tell someone, reading this post I’ve made up my mind to confuse in someone anyone d spirit leads me to amongst my friends..I really want it all to end..I’m tired of the off and On..I want to stop Totally..God help me
Ire,
Many will agree with you that porn addiction is a difficult cycle to exit. However, with God, it IS possible. I would encourage you to first pray and ask God for guidance. And, keep praying. Don’t stop reaching out to God for healing. Telling someone about your addiction is hard, but it is an important step towards establishing accountability. We cannot walk through life alone, especially when we are struggling with something so damaging as porn.
Do not give up, friend. You can overcome this. Praying for you!
Moriah
I’ve been watching porn since it was legalized in New Zealand in the mid 1980’s. At least 34 years. Dam! I wish they had never legalized it. I experienced erectile dysfunction in my last relationship. It was awful. So frustrating and humiliating. I am a recovered alcoholic. Hv been sober over 24 years. I drank for 16 years. But i haven’t been able to recover from this addiction. I spend quite alot of my time feeling depressed and lonely yet there i am helping other alcoholics who are new to AA to get and stay sober. My porn addiction interferes with my quality of sobriety big time. I also visit the massage place yet not for full sex but still to get sexual relief. I feel very lonely at times. I hv been going to the gym for 37 yrs for bodybuilding and fitness so I’m in very good shape physically but not spiritually and therefore not emotionally and mentally either. This sucks
getting rid of computers may have been a logical solution at one time but in this age it’s not so easy. I’m a truck driver. I listen to podcasts, sermons and whateve going down the road to help pass the time. I also have a company-provided tablet because we have several apps that are needed with our job.
I used computers, tablets at my phone for many things besides my addiction. I’m a recovered alcoholic. I know where to find liquor but today I choose not to drink. I thought I could use the same principles to quit this other addiction but I seem to fail every time.
You can remove the smartphone, computer and avoiding going into a store that sells porn all ya want. However, if the desire to stop isn’t fully there your just deceiving yourself. I’ve thrown two expensive smartphones into the river just to go buy another two days later. If a person truly wants to stop this demonic activity go visit a Nursing Home daily. Go for a daily walk in the cemetery. Educate yourself on all the porn stars that blew their brains out or died of a drug overdose. Then realize the fact that life is very short, heaven and hell are real and chances are your lusting and masturbating to a dead person.
Honestly this article helped but, to all who are still struggling out there. I myself was addicted to pornography for 4 years, i never told anyone, never opened up, the only people i talked to about it was my friends and we were always just relating and making jokes about it. Then i moved, went to a new church, and the pastor isnt that old maybe in his early 30s possibly 20s. he was a youth pastor for 6 years, and i opened up to him and he immidiately took my side, commforting me with the re-assuring fact that its natural for you to want to seek out women and often that can lead to things such as porn. but you cant let that be the path you take, while yes many have done it, that doesnt mean you stick with it. you must pray, you must confess to God, and you absolutely need someone in your corner who will be there judge free. someone who understands and has maybe even been there, and when you feel the urge just text someone, talk to someone say hey i need someone to talk to right now. put on some gospel music to get your mind off of it. if your on your computer,turn it off and pray. Im 14 and after getting my mind right im on the road to recovery, i hope my testimony helped someone, God bless you all.
Samuel,
Thank you for sharing your testimony! I pray that many will read it and be encouraged.
God bless!
Moriah
Hi, I’ve been addicted to watching porn/self gratification for 33yrs. I’ve tried everything to quit but nothing works. Please play for me to find permanent deliverance.
Hello! Thanks for reaching out. We’re here to help any way we can. Here’s an article that has consolidated the process of quitting into six simple (not easy!) steps. Have you tried these? We’ve also created a free, 21-day detox program called STRIVE designed to help you get started. Check it out here!
Blessings,
Keith
I’ve been struggling with porn most of my life I manage to stay off for about three months but then I breakdown, I feel a mixture of relief and shame.
Hello! Thanks for your comment. Keep up the good work in your fight to quit porn! We’re here for you and rooting for you. I hope you’ll take advantage of the many resources we have available along the journey. You may want to try our free, 21-day challenge called STRIVE.
Blessings,
Keith
Just be praying for him is not an easy task coz even me am addicted I also need help 😭
My husband has been having affairs and lying and deceiving me our whole marriage. I knew in my gut he was cheating. I couldn’t prove it. He had a way of provoking arguments in front of my sons and It always looked like it was my fault. When I found my husbands phone I saw what was going on. He is a voyuer. He likes pictures of women. He was paying them to send their pictures. I got a counselors name from a christian org. and when I talked with them again and told them he was only counseling my husband not me they said don’t go back. Since then he won’t go to any counseling. He blames me for his not wanting to go back. Everything he does he becomes addicted. He gambles, he drinks, he lies, I think he’s on something not sure what but I’m pretty sure. Our adult sons were embarrassed and upset . They don’t have much to do with him. I tried to tell them something was wrong. When they found out about the phone and everything they couldn’t believe it. At one time I asked them if their dad had a phone . They were working with him I thought they would see. He was so sneaky he would be texting and talking to these women right beside our sons and they didn’t even know.He doesn’t go to church now and won’t go. He does not know Jesus. He just left to go to a job in texas he’s in construction. The last woman he was involved with is there. Im sure he will contact her he had me get all of my things out of our camper. Please pray for dan and me Thank you
I am so, so sorry. I hope you’ll find a counselor who can help you process emotions and consider healthy boundaries for yourself. A group would be great. And there are online resources at Bloom that you might find helpful as well. Whatever your husband chooses, YOU choose to be healthy and whole. Peace to you, Kay
Please pray for me I am suffering with this. Any prayers will help. Please I beg you!
I’m so sorry 😐
Please pray for me to I’m trying to stop please keep me in your prayers I’m really struggling
dont judge him we all see t but we dont like it i am just 14 and i am suffering
i feel i am like i am dead
I have been watching open a veryong time and now it hurts me I am Christian. Please pray for me I really want to stop, I do good then Satan works my brain. I love Jesus with everything in me. Please pray, my girlfriend of 25 years died from M S And I am taking care of her Special needs son who I love. It is hard and I want to stop.
Girl, if you don’t leave him! What good is that guy. He doesn’t care. He rather feed his sexual desires than his family. So what you do is leave. And start a new life. Maybe when he sees you got up and left it’ll change his mind. And that may not work or it might. But most importantly you’ll be out that toxic relationship. You’ll be free. And he might change. But please don’t stay there suffering for him. I see your pain and your tenacity. But sister! You gotta let God take control. You HAVE GOT TO get your mind Ready. Heart breaks hurt. But what’s even better is when God heals it.
I really appreciate what you said here: leaving a toxic relationship may or may not change the other person, but it means peace and freedom for the victim. This is so, so important! Our boundaries are for our own health and safety, first and foremost. We are the precious, beloved children of God, not required to live under slavery to sin, including the sin of a spouse.
And so many times we are unwilling to have healthy boundaries because we’re trying to control the other person, rather than trusting God to care for us no matter what.
Thanks for pointing this out!
Unfortunately gulagg defines the deceitfulness of sin to a tee and refutes every psychologist, doctor, clergy and neuro surgeon in the world!
Great article.Thanx so much.15 days free and not going back.I never thought of this addiction in this way.The article,blog,essay,whatever it might be called hit the nail on the head.Satan does use the porn exactly the way described.Shame,disgust,guilt are all the things a Christian feels after the stuff is viewed because it does not smell on your breath or cause an unsteady walk or glassy eyes.We feel like we have let ourselves,our loved ones,our wives and most important our Lord down.Thanx for this uplifting yet hard hitting message.I really believe i did not stumble upon this site by accident.Praise God that He answered my prayers and used your ministry to do it.
Kindly share the site with me on andamsteve@gmail.com
Need help
If you email me requesting me to add you to my email list you will receive 6 emails a week to encourage you in your recovery.
doyel@me.com
Yes please
I too watch porn but by God i have been able to control it eeven in the midst of the confusion
1. delete any porn videos immediately after watching
2. Try to read your bible at least one chapter a day with such focus llke its porn to you
3. Go to hurch to hear God’s word its like a drug for the sickness if it hasnt healed it yet it helps you control it.
4. Get into a relationship with someone that can help like talks to you often about things that distract your mind from porn
5. Try to know God’s Holy Spirit
6. Allow the pain of regret to take full hold after each porn circle
7. Just create your own pictures if you still go on to watch it
8. Try to get a passion different and deep as the when you are watching porn like singing playing football , travelling, etc whatever any other thing you like
9, Go into self meditation saying yourself
I am not and will never be a porn adict
10. Spend time with spouse family and friends
11. Know that if any body can stop it since the history of mankind you can too
12 . Know that I Love you
13. Eacch time you pray about it or somethig God is always (i repeat(always)) listening to you to .He is desperate to do that even if it means him canceling his own personal appointments. In God’s picture you always come first , just the same way a child is to his/her mother
great article, there is hope for all who want to be free but it wont come from a wave of a magic wand, discipline, mindfulness, accountability and God.
i have found great accountability in a local celebrate recovery chapter.
the world has turned their focused to women’s rights and upliftment… we need the kind of encoragement and prayers with support, as we read this amazing article, we must share about it and encourage more men in our society. thank you
I am Thomas Kelly, I’m a Christian but struggled with porn for years. I want to stop and live a life for Jesus, but keep falling into this temptation. I prayed to God and ask Him to take this sexual desire out of my heart and give me new desires to do His will. I’m starting to think God doesn’t hear me, so I walk through life and have this urge of pain in my heart. Now I see darkness all around me and in my mind I think my life is hopeless, I have suicidal thoughts and wishing if I commit suicide all of my pain will go away. I also written in my journal every time I lay in my bed all I can think about is the wrong choices, I have made. I don’t feel like living no more and one day someone read my journal and know the pain that is in my heart.
My three desires:
1 Live my life for Jesus
2 Have a impact in this world for Jesus
3 To Do His Will and reach millions of lives
Hello, Thomas – I’m deeply concerned about your comments about suicide – here’s the truth…you have unmeasurable value! Your life is a precious gift and a blessing to this planet. Please find someone you can talk to about your struggles. If you don’t have anyone you can talk to, and you start to have suicidal feelings again, promise me you’ll call this number: 1-800-273-8255.
God is for you! Thomas, you can get through this, and it will be hard work, but it’s worth it. Remember the strength you have in Christ – Romans 8 can remind you. The cross of Jesus Christ IS strong enough to overcome everything. Even this. I didn’t see you mention anything about accountability. You won’t be able to overcome this without it. Everyone tries, but victory only comes with Christ and community.
Peace, Chris
Chris, my name is Nate Danser and I work for Pure Life Ministries. I just wanted to let you know that THERE IS HOPE for you. Our ministry was created to help men like you who are at the end of their rope. We have a Residential Program in Kentucky that is full of men (75 of them!) who are desperately seeking God for victory over this. If you want to live your life for Jesus, to have an impact in this world for him and do His will, PLEASE check us out.
Jesus Christ came to destroy the works of the devil in our lives, and He is still powerful enough to do the same thing for you! http://www.purelifeministries.org/residential will give you a lot of information.
Also, we have an Annual Conference coming up in Florence, KY on April 28th and 29th. We would LOVE to see you there, get to know you, and figure out how best we could help you. conference.purelifeministries.org
I will put in a prayer request for you, and you will be prayed for during our weekly student prayer meeting.
God bless.
Thomas, Peace be with you! I experienced great sorrow for years because I could not shake sinfulness from my life in the realm of human sexuality. Sexuality goes so deep, even down to our being made male and female and each soul has its own unique impacts because of our sex. Keep up the hope and dust yourself off every time you fall. Your life is not lost and it is not hopeless: don’t give in to these dark thoughts. Know that you cannot always control the temptations from without, but with prayer and acknowledgment of your Sonship, that these ideas of suicide and hopelessness become lies used to take you from your eternal destiny, which is Joy in Christ.
Recently, I lost a wonderful person in my life that I love deeply because of pornography and masturbation. As I thought about marrying this beautiful woman I knew I had to finally stop this behavior if I wanted to be fully available to her in my being. She found out before I could muster up the strength to tell her of my addictions. Losing her was the impetus to quit, though, I know she will never be sufficient for me: all of us, even the most happy person, ultimately longs for the Triune God and will be in a very real way experience this existential loneliness this side of heaven. Be of good cheer: we know that Jesus alone can fill that ache in all of us, and He will never depart from us. Jesus loves you: I’d suggest you take up your journaling and really try to see where your hurting is coming from, find someone local to talk to about it, and up your dosage of devotion to Mary, Joseph, and the Eucharist. Pax!
Don’t give up your not alone. Sucide is not a way out you will still have to answer for that ultimate chose too. I too have had those same thoughts. It’s the people who are left behind that truly suffer. Suscide in my opinion is selfish. There are alternatives I hope and pray you do reconsider. I have and my life has been much better since I made that chose! Hang in there their are people out there to help you Cary your load! I will pray for you that you will find that help!
What’s the lords will though mabey he doesn’t need you want to reach millions that’s not humble were Kent to keep out of view from the world millions would be considered the world mabey gods plan is for you to reach 1 person through your entire life
If you email me requesting me to add you to my email list you will receive 6 emails a week to encourage you in your recovery.
doyel@me.com
Please remember that all things can be fought and won with God’s help . keep fighting your not alone.
I feel the exact same way. 😢
Hello Thomas I Know how you feel. Please don’t give up. My ex-husband started me to watch porn. He wanted me to be more into it. I have stop for months and then it will come back. But I am believing God that I will be porn free.
Thomas,
I to was stuck for a long time in porn addiction; for close to 15 years. For years I prayed for God to take away my desires for this sin but I couldn’t stop. I knew if I wanted to grow in Godly maturity and become the man God called me to be I needed to stop. The scripture that convicted me was Ezekiel 8 where God shows Ezekiel how the priests of Israel where keeping idols in their hidden preistly chambers for secret worship. I finally told my wife of whom I have been married to for 8 years my struggles. I expected her to be upset, hurt, angry but she wasn’t. She felt sorry for me that I had struggled for so long. I confessed that I sinned against her and the Lord and she forgave me I I know the Lord forgave me (1John 1:9). She prayed with me and became my accountability partner. I have never felt the love of God more richly than in that moment. What became clear to me was that I lacked faith. I was quenching the Spirit by making flesh choices instead of faith choices. The faith in Christ my wife had allowed Him to love me through her. My road to recovery has not been without failures along the way but by the grace of God and the love he shows me through His forgiveness and the freedom from the power of sin(Rom6:7) I am able to win this battle daily. I have been able to go without porn for a whole year. There is hope. The greatest lies are the ones we tell ourselves and they come from the enemy who is Satan. The lie I bought into was that I was worthless. This is a lie. Scripture tells us over and over that we are loved by God so much that he was willing to die and pay the penalty of sin on our behalf so that we can be reconciled to Him ( Colossians 2:13-14, Romans 5:8, Ephesians 1) . You are important and you have a purpose. God’s plan of redemption is on every page of the Bible.
I would like to encourage you to do 2 things: read your Bible and pray everyday. This 2 things are simple but effective. They also provide a starting point. Doing this constantly and diligently WILL change your life. We cannot grow and become mature believers without this. We cannot we live for Christ, produce good fruit, and win souls if we do not know his word. No preacher or teacher can have faith for us, every man must have his own faith. Ephesians 6 reminds us that we do not wrestle against flesh and blood. We must use our weapons to deal with enemy attacks; our sword is the word of God and prayer is our heavy artillery. I find the times when I am most tempted to look at porn (walk in the flesh in general) are times when I have neglected prayer and reading God’s word.
2 resources that have been blessings for me have been Nancy Misslers books “The way of Agape” and ”Be Ye transformed” you can find them on Amazon or there is audio on firefighters.org I think. YouTube also has video of her presentations. Also Chuck Missler Bible studies (also on YouTube) are amazing. He goes through the Bible book by book and verse by verse simply teaching the Bible.
I will pray for you Thomas, as a brother in the Lord I have your back. Please know that God loves you not because I posted on this website but because His word says so. We are freed from the power of sin Rom6:7. Renew your mind daily (Romans 12:1-2) through prayer and the word. There is hope because you were purchased at a high price by Christ on the cross. I would encourage you to talk to a mature believer. These issues are ok to talk about James 5:16 says to confess your sins to one another and pray for one another that you may be healed. If you can’t find anyone to talk to you can email me if you like heidebrecht@gmail.com.
Jeremy
Hi Thomas, I have similar struggles as you…I was exposed to porn at a young age on accident, and it has been with me for years. I cant tell you that you will be able to quit any time soon, but one verse that helps me frequently is “and we know that all things work together for good to those who love God. To those who are called according to his purpose” Romans 8:28 He forgives and forgets all sins, so continue to pray, meet with the local church, and read his word. You can overcome this!
Thomas i don’t know you. But man i been where you at. I still kinda am lol. But bro! Don’t give up. You gotta want the outcome So much you won’t care about the process. You see if your eyes are on Jesus and you don’t take them away from him. You won’t fall. Look man your human. I made some dumb choices. And it kills me. I wish i could start all over. And i can, tomorrow. Everyday is a new day. Remember your the son of Yeshua. The one who can bring the dead Alive and make the blind see. We hear that all the time! But it’s amazing! Your forgiven. Don’t bring yourself down because of that. Eliminate things like Social media. Eliminate the gateways. You already ahead by realizing there’s a problem. Love You man. And don’t give up
I want to die after watching porn. I want this to stop.
Hi, Jim – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. I’m deeply concerned about your comments about dying – here’s the truth…you have unmeasurable value! Your life is a precious gift and a blessing to this planet. Unique. Unrepeatable. Please find someone you can talk to about your struggles. If you don’t have anyone you can talk to, and you start to have suicidal feelings again, promise me you’ll call this number: 1-800-273-8255, if you are in the United States. They also have a chat feature that always has someone there to respond.
Stay strong Thomas remember there is authority and power in the blood of Jesus. Use it over your addiction. Victory in the name of Jesus
Thomas,
Keep trying. Do not give up. Let people you trust and love in your life know that you are struggling. Get help!!! You can not do it alone.
Sam
St. Francis de Sales writes about the devout life. In it he states that it is not enough to stop sinning, but to also uproot, the “affection for sin.” I am an addict, and it is hard to admit it to myself: “I love this sin.” :( (makes me sick to my stomach) But until I can say that to myself, I can’t uproot it, because I am protecting it. I need God’s grace to not only stop sinning, but to hate this sin, and fear Him. For we truly fear hurting those whom we love, this is a holy fear. Also, sometimes this temptation doesn’t come from the spiritual, but from the physical, and requires a physical response to stop: barriers, saying “no.”, and building up the will in other ways.
Amen
I am addicted to Porn long time and struggled to be a Christian .Also I am deaf,too. It is difficult to find a man interpreter to join a group. I felt trapped without prayer.and let your prayer for me that would help fight the battle .JESUS HAS GONE THRU SUFFERING AND TEMPTATION.HE IS ABLE TO HELP US IF WE ARE BEING TEMPTED HEBREWS 2:18.
want to follow up on this stat:
Why are the statistics saying that over 50% of all Christian men are addicted to porn?
where did you find this? do you have a link to support this info? much appreciated…
Bev Sterk
Hello, Bev – It’s not exactly 50%, but Barna did a study in “The Porn Phenomenon” in 2016 that points to 46% of men seeking porn monthly. If you’re interested in more stats, that’s a good place to begin.
Hi I just wanted to say it is really hard yah know I masurbate because I’m afraid of being alone I mean I have had sex with a woman like recently that I truly care about but, I’m afraid it might end up like past times or I’m just kinda lonely at times and I depended on porn still do I’m marking today the day that I try and stop completely because I need to it seems nothing good comes out of it and I just hate myself afterwards. Wish me luck y’all and pray for me if yah could.
Hello, James – I bet you can appreciate that it will take more than luck! It requires some hard work and firm decisions. Here’s a blog post to help: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2010/05/13/3-biblical-strategies-for-fighting-lust/ and another here that helps explain the battle: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2016/06/30/stop-looking-at-porn-you-sicko-part-1/
Peace, Chris
I will pray for your needs and fears….it’s not easy but possible when there hope and faith in our lord
God bless you, and grant u the strength and faith u need through ur journey
hello, I am struggling with this issue of wanting to see explicit images. I haven’t gotten to the stage if there is stages, of masturbation, I am so afraid of having extreme remorse regarding this. I have gone forward to tell my spiritual leader, and found that becoming accountable helped, but a deep and true repentance was and is not yet achieved. I told my wife of this desire I have. and she was supportive. I say was because she thinks I am healed. I don’t want to hurt her, yet I know I am lying to her. I am tired of repenting and I feel as if God knowing my heart is tired of seeing me on the elementary level of repentance. please help.
Hello, you’re in the middle of battle. A battle for your heart. It’s tough, tough going. BUT, there is hope. Day by day. Press on. Continue to read. Continue to repent. Continue. Continue. Continue. You are fighting a relentless enemy. A question to reflect on: Do you truly want to stop? Do you truly believe porn is a horrible evil? Here are a couple of posts that can help you reflect on the true nature of your resolve and belief:
Blog post #1
Blog post #2
Press on, brother! God is for you. He is not tired of watching you fight. He’s got His hand on your shoulder, whispering in your ear, “I am strong enough. Look to Me. Depend on Me. Victory is MINE.”
Peace, Chris
Jordaan, remember that when you repent, God forgives, and forgets all your sins. He understands we are weak and sinful, and when he died on the cross he carried all of mans sin with him. Stay strong brother, God Bless
Read the article, stopped taking it serious when you mentioned god…
Hey friend. You might appreciate a site like Fight the New Drug. Hope that helps, Kay
God again… as a magic pill, if you believe. Grow up.
Hi, Jean – your way appears to not include God. That’s fine. Why is my way, which includes God so offensive to you? I’m genuinely curious.
Chris
Hi, my name is Paul I’ve struggled with watch porn since I was in the 5th grade. It began just as curiosity and then began watching it more frequently. I’m in high school at a certain point I was able to break free from this sin. The reason for this was beacause I got diagnosed with kidney faluire then recieved a transplant. After a year so later I began watching porn thinking to myself I could stop any time I wanted to. But the truth is that it’s difficult to ignore the thought of not watching. I hate myself for watching it because I know I’m better than this. And every time I watch porn all I think in the back of my mind is that I didn’t deserve to get this kidney or a second chance at life. And hat that I think that but I just don’t know what to do.
Hi, Paul – I’m sorry that you are struggling. Here’s a place to start – a simple question that requires a simple, but firm answer – do you want to quit? What I didn’t read in your comment is that you want to quit but it must – IT MUST – start there. As Oswald Chambers says, “make a clear and effective decision about sin.” Here and here are a couple of blog posts that might help you take some steps in a helpful direction. Gos is for you! Read Romans 8 as a reminder of Who Jesus is, who you are, and the power your have because of the cross of Christ.
Peace, Chris
Hello,
My name is Sarah and I used to watch porn as many have. I was fortunate enough (when I found out porn was a sin) to stop cold turkey. After I haven’t had the desire to see it with many prayers to God and never allowed myself to be put in situations where I could be tempted.
I have been with my fiance for 10 years. I’ve committed to him. We have two children together. He’s been struggling with porn for over 8 years that I know of. We broken up over this many of time. We are suppose to get married this July 7, 2017. But I recently found out he’s still watching it after many of promises and chances. I tell him I feel disrespected and not valued as his partner.
I’m making the choice to not marry him anymore. I’m not sure if that’s the right thing to do but I’m not sure what else to tell him. He says if I didnt spy on him (go through his phone ) that I wouldn’t know anything. I feel beyond disrespected and betrayed.
Any advice I would much appreciate. Do cancel the wedding and leave him with no more chances?! Or do I just turn a blind eye and just deal with it?!
Best regards,
Sarah
Hey Sarah,
I guess it kind of depends on what kind of marriage you want to have. You know what’s going on, you know his response. If you want to live with his choices, that’s up to you. If you’re okay with things as they are, I’d say go ahead with the wedding.
If you don’t want your marriage to be this way, then you’ve got some hard choices to make. You can’t control his choices, but you can control your own.
Peace to you,
Kay
Hey there ones thing I want to mention is that
It’s not totally your fiance fault he is not only responsible for his condition. Society also plays a greater role he sometimes feel lonely sometimes distressed that’s why he is found it
And fair enough in men testes levels are quite high yeah u may feel betrayed but that’s not his choice in reality he deserves u if really he is not betraying u anymore.. Stay blessed stay happy
Work tho it
Hi ,
I think I have become addictive to porn to a point of masturbating
I have prayed and confess to my God father and he helped in praying for me but it seems as if after sometimes I went back to them.even when I sleep I just wake up feeling as to do so. I am a lady , I love God but I keep on deceiving him although I know it is gud,I keep on in the shameful act.
Please could you please help me pray , I need prayers
God is coming soon and I ask that we need to all stop this nonsense of porn. You are looking at a screen that won’t make you breakfast like a wife would. Every time you look at a video, the porn industry makes money. Watching porn adds fuel to the fire. God says that it is better to be maimed and enter the kingdom of God than to rot in hell. Give up all your electronics and magazines for the sake of your soul! Pray for the end of the porn industry.
Please pray for me as I am struggling with this a lot and I am too afraid to really tell anyone that I know closely.
Hi, my name is Chris i just want to stop watching porn so that i can be my best self and come back to God. I am typing this cos i just want to know that soeone out there cares cos its so hard telling friends about this addiction of mine but i’ve made up my mind to tell a friend or two about this. I just need some encouragement so that i can defeat this addiction and sin cos i am tired of doig this alone and failing
Hi, Christopher – I’m sorry you’re struggling, and yes, someone is here! And, it’s an awesome step to speak openly about this issue with a trusted friend. Please do that soon!
That spirit of shame and disgust is so heavy. But, it wants you to keep secrets and hide the issue because when you do that, the enemy wins. BUT, in the light, and saving Grace-filled love of Jesus, that disgust and shame is crushed.
Let me direct for a minute. Jesus did not die for us to flounder! It’s time to man-up :) So, I lovingly and directly offer to you that it’s time to put on your suit of armor and instead of seeing this as struggle, look at it as a battlefield. A good soldier wouldn’t go out expecting to die, so get out there and fight and don’t accept anything less than victory. You don’t have to give way to these sins, you choose to. Victory comes moment by moment. Not in life-long promises never to sin again. The enemy loves those promises! “Give us this day our daily bread.”
Be strong! Christ did not die, descend to the depths of hell, conquer death, and rise to glory only to be defeated by your struggle. He overcame the struggle for YOU! Yes, for you. God is for you and will be your strength. But, you must act. Look at Joseph in Egypt – when tempted by Potiphar’s wife, he didn’t stay and ponder the situation. No, he ACTED and RAN! Now is your time. If you still have access to porn through a computer or smartphone, then pitch it. Through the TV? Toss it out the window. Battle.
I hope the best for you, I truly do.
Chris
I am a woman who suffers this . I’m addicted and believe me when I say I want to stop. I beat myself emotionally trying to stop and I fall back. I don’t know what to do. I have a family, I am married I still love my husband intimately, I have no issues in that. I just really want to stop. It makes me feel disappointed in myself after it. I started doing this when I lost my virginity at 16 to a much older man. He’d say it was ok to watch. Anyways he messed up my life in a lot of ways. I thank God I found the “out” but what I didn’t find an out to was porn. I am happily married, my husband used to watch it all the time but he stopped cold turkey i don’t know how but he did.
Hi, Em – I’m proud of you for saying something. Now it might be time to do some drastic things. How badly do you really want to stop? It starts with a clear, effective, on your knees, shouting out commitment to go a new direction. Here’s a blog post with some really practical steps for men or women: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2012/04/23/how-to-quit-porn-6-essential-steps/ I hope that it’s helpful.
I need help bad im so addicted to porn
Hi, Chet, I’m glad that you’re stepping forward. What have you tried? Are you using Covenant Eyes? Staying stuck is your choice. Only you can make the decision to stop and we can help if you make that decision. Sign up. That will give you a first step and prove that you’re serious about breaking free. There’s an old proverb that says, “fall down 7 times but get up 8.” I hope that’s you.
Chris
I need help in this area. I feel like a failure, was baptized last year and now I’m doubting why, if I have not changed my actions or thoughts. Will God forgive me for committing this same sin? Am I still considered a Christian?
Hi, one of the many amazing characteristics of God is His ability to forgive. Instantly. Tomorrow is a new day! Fresh mercy, for you. Let’s get to the root – why haven’t you stopped? Do you still have too much access? Is it time to get rid of the iPhone or whatever you are using? What steps are you really willing to take to quit? Only you can answer that.
Go read Romans 8 – that’s what you are! A warrior. Fearless. Of God. Rooted on by God. Will God forgive you again? Yes. Are you stilla Christian? That question implies that the act of watching porn may have erased your initial commitment. The answer is yes, you’re still a Christian – porn didn’t remove that. But, let me say this with all the love and grace and directness that I can – it’s time for more! And, you won’t experience a “more” and full and amazing life while watching porn. It’s impossible.
So, stand up, look up, repent, and step forward. Tomorrow is a new day!
Chris
Please pray for me, I really want to feel Gods presence and be close to him and be used of him. But I can’t stop watching porn I’ve been a Christian for 2 years now and I’m worried that I might not be truly converted because I feel like I’m a slave of porn, can someone please pray for me and put their email address below to be my liability partner?
Hello, Roy – finding a good accountability partner – someone you can trust even with secrets – is tough. Have you tried a virtual accountability relationship? One like Bravehearts: https://mighty-men.mn.co or X3 Groups: https://x3groups.smallgroupsonline.com
hi! i am a guy suffering porn addiction and masturbation since i was 16 yrs old now i am22.i hate my life because these addiction messes my life.. i am a college student but i dont have enough GPA even to get a job after graduation.. porn disturbs my spritual & academic life I’ve been high ranking student back in elementary & highschool.i wish i have never been born
Hello, Jon – I’m so sorry to hear about your situation. You were meant to thrive – not suffer like this. It sounds like maybe you’re trying to beat this monster on your own. It’s just not possible. Secrets are destroying you. They always win in a battle with just you. Can you find other “wingmen” for this battle? Can you find ONE trusted person that you get really open and honest with? Can you close the doorways to the internet that are causing problems? After 6 years, it will likely require some professional help, in addition to all of those things I just suggested. It will take a team. And, of supreme importance for your team must be the Holy Spirit of God, as you ask for renewal of your mind. I’m not trying to heap a bunch of “to-do’s” to your life. But, you can’t expect different results when you keep digging in the same hole. New choices. New thoughts. New paths. New behaviors. All of this is necessary for a new result. You do these things and then watch God sweep in a turbo-charge your efforts. The choice is yours!
Peace to you,
Chris
My husband started looking at porn and going to strip clubs when he began working out of town. He kept it all a secret until I accidentally found out about it. It has practically destroyed me as I had no idea he was this type of person, and we have been married 30 years. He has been working hard to redeem himself and has been doing good and I have been going to counseling but I never knew he had so much lust in his heart and that is the part that kills me. Even now he still struggles with it and it makes me so sad because he would never be able to find another woman that loves him as much as I do, and have.. and yet sometimes it seems its just all about sex. Like you wrote in reason #1, it doesnt matter if it comes from your wife or porn…the feeling is the same. Isn’t there more to life than sex and a woman’s body parts. How about what she has to give from the inside. Do men ever get it?
There absolutely is more to life than sex and body parts! The older we get, the more important it is to invest in those things…
I think men can get it. It takes a long time and lot of work, though. They have to stay in their process and keep doing their work. The real, true work of recovery is very painful and pain-staking. And, I think our culture generally does not allow men the kind of emotional tools that are needed for work like this. Our culture says, “be a man” and “big boys don’t cry.” Men learn that when they’re in pain, their only options are to be angry or act out sexually. They aren’t allowed to feel or to process their pain in healthy ways. To truly recover requires the acquisition of these emotional skills. Often men will be able to do okay behaviorally in terms of habitual behaviors, but that is only the first step. If he’s not able to work through his own pain and learn new ways of coping with his emotions, he’ll go back to what’s always worked: porn.
My husband got it, and our marriage is better today than it ever was before porn. But it hasn’t been easy, quick, or painless. I wrote a bit about the difference between behavioral trust and emotional trust a while back, and I think that might connect to the thoughts you’re expressing here.
Peace to you, Kay
Im a 21 year old man and i get exactly what your saying. Theres a part of me who wants to find a women whom i can hold and cherish. Share a life with and grow a family with. The bad thing theres a part of me that has the lust for porn. Its so difficult to quit completely. I cant sleep, it makes it hard to focus. Porn and sex addiction is a SERIOUS problem. I hope your husband gets better. I really hope that my addiction is gone so i can pour myself into a healthy relationship.
Please help me and pray for me because i want to be cleansed of this awful porn addiction so that i can be a good Christian saint in my Pentecostal Christian church for my dear Jesus christ.
can i have the emails but not the god stuff
Hi, jungle Jhon, I’m 23 old man, I think I’m addicted to porn, when I’m in 14, I watched my first porn, my friends taught me porn and masturbation. When i watched porn at the first time i was so scared but after that it becomes part of me. in my 14 i watched lots of porn videos and photos all the day and night without sleeping without going to school with out going to relatives without going functions. I lost my confidence. Now I’m scared about my life and my life partner. I kept it secret. Now i want to share with you and quit porn and recover my life and yours
I’ve been dealing with sexual addiction and porn since I was a kid.Im 38 years old and felt drawn to the ministry. When I was saved I had no want to watch porn. I was free for over a year before fell back in it. Maybe if I tell others about my problem I can then find healing. So here it is. I’m addicted to porn. I know I’m going to heaven, however I want to be obedient to the Lord and be porn free.
Josh, I appreciate your honesty. As a leader of a flock, it’s time to get serious. You cannot pour freedom and purity out of a dirty cup. Get open and honest with at least one, if not multiple “wingmen.” James 5:16 compels us to live openly and Ephesians 5 compels us to live in the light. You can’t beat it alone.
Chris
Hey, I am a 17yr old female and I have been struggling with pornography and masturbation for years. From the age of 3 or 4, I began actively pursuing sexual stimulation before knowing that what I was doing was essentially masturbation. I believe I was in elementary school when I was exposed to pornography. I had found my dad’s porn while looking around his room. My younger sibling also saw it as well. Although we thought it was disgusting and quickly left it alone, the cover image on that CD was etched into my mind and has changed my life for the worse. I started searching for material like what I saw out of curiousity and from there it spiraled out of control. The content of what I watched became really dark, and even more appalling but I continued to watch it anyways. I had always called myself a christian but I didn’t fully give my life to Him until earlier this year. Over the years, I have tried to quit because I know it is sin, I am aware of the negative impact it has on my perception of people and my life in general, and I don’t want to be like this yet I keep falling back into it. I honestly thought I was over this because I had been clean from sexual immorality for almost 2 months. I stopped listening to sinful music, and cut off other triggers I knew I had, was praying more, and actually reading the bible consistently. Recently, I moved away from home for university and my sibling was my accountibility partner but it just isn’t the same. Also, my sibling was able to resist falling back into this sin and has been on fire for Jesus. I am involved in a christian group on my campus, feel like God is calling me to take part in ministry, and was helping others with their own struggles when I was clean but now… I feel unqualified, sinful, ashamed, and pathetic. I don’t want to be this way and I know I need help. I don’t have anybody here to confide in about this; or maybe I just don’t trust them enough because they’re still new to me, and people think I’ve got it all together but I don’t since I had disclosed how I became free of it and now I’m in it again. It feels impossible, and I don’t want to be taking God’s grace for granted. He has been so good to me… I just feel like I need to move on from this and do His will instead of dealing with the same issue all the time. He has brought me a long way but this problem is still here and it needs to be resolved. I’ve been under spiritual attack as well and I don’t want to be leaving room for Satan in my life. I just want to be basking in God’s love always. I know God’s design is so much better but I’ve accustomed myself to settling for less. Sorry for the life story, I’m trying to take steps in the right direction by being completely transparent for once and begin healing.
Hi there.
I am so sorry for the pain you are suffering and I’m so glad you wrote in. Hopefully I’ll be able to help.
First of all, deliberately exposing children to pornography is a form of child sexual abuse. Perhaps you were only accidentally exposed to your dad’s porn, but he brought that into your house and did not protect you from it, which meant that you were exposed to traumatic sexual content at a very early age without any way to process or understand what you had seen. Children will ALWAYS “act out” what they are trying to understand.
Secondly, it is very normal for children to explore their own bodies. Our sexual system is part of our physical selves, and it’s normal for us to figure out how that part of us works. We learn to walk, we learn to talk, we learn about our sexuality. There is nothing weird or abnormal about that. However, we have a great deal of shame in our culture around sexuality, especially for girls and women. Women aren’t “supposed” to be sexual while men are “supposed” to be hypersexual. Our sexuality is normal.
Third, shame is a liar. Shame says that you are “unqualified, sinful, ashamed, pathetic” when in fact you are completely loved, safe, and chosen, created in the image of God, totally beloved.
Fourth, shame will never, ever help us be healthy. It only makes us feel worse. So, while it’s a liar, it also drags us deeper into our problems. Here’s a short animation I made recently on shame and how it never helps, and what we can do to break out of shame cycles.
So. What’s the way forward? Well, since you mentioned that you’re a college student, I’m going to bet that there are campus counseling services available to you. I would suggest that you make an appointment and talk to someone about the trauma you suffered as a small child through porn exposure. Work through the shame that you’re feeling around your sexuality. I think once you take care of the trauma and the shame, you’ll be much better prepared to make healthier choices for yourself going forward. Once you’ve talked to a counselor you may feel safer to open up to one or two other safe people. And I bet you will find that you are FAR FROM ALONE in what you’re going through.
Peace to you,
Kay
Please don’t allow this downfall to make you believe that you’re unworthy. Firstly, forgive yourself, secondly join this Christian Group as it will encourage you to pray and meditate on the word and before you know you’ll be delivered, and finally bear in mind that it is possible to help yourself by helping others, see for the mere fact that you’ve been a victim of the devils trap for so long means that you know how it feels and you can lead someone out of their bondage by simply trying to help them.
I KNOW YOU’RE GONNA BEAT THIS, I KNOW YOU CAN SO PLEASE BELIEVE IT
Maybe this could the beginning of my healing, it has been probably 6years of porn addiction but am ready to say goodbye now. I can’t tell anyone cause am afraid they would judge me but am trusting God for healing.
it is not easy for me i tried a lot
Hello I am also struggling with porn I have been saved about two years an orderly watched porn over 30 times I have been trying to crucify this flesh but I keep going back to my vomit. I felt God’s granted me repentance an keep going back to it I feel like I’m becoming reprobate annoys harder for me to overcome it I was free recently for a couple months but when my desires are strong I do it an I feel like nothing is wrong then I feel like I hate myself an God hates me an Im going to hell for it I really need help. Im thinking of breaking my smart phone because all my lustful desires are just a click away. I want to be forgiven an live for Jesus but I kind of feel like I ran out of chances to be forgiven an I’m overcome an entangled like apostle Peter said an now I think it would of have been better for me that I would have nver known the truth. I need help sometimes I wish I was never created an I hate myself an this world an I even get mad a t God sometimes for creating me 😩😢
Hello, John – I’m proud of you for leaving your comment on the blog because it is very difficult to admit our struggles. I’m deeply concerned about your comments about suicide – here’s the truth…you have unmeasurable value! Your life is a precious gift and a blessing to this planet. Unique. Unrepeatable. Oh, and God doesn’t run out of forgiveness – there’s a great song right now about His forgiveness being an plentiful as “the drops in the ocean.” Please find someone you can talk to about your struggles. If you don’t have anyone you can talk to, and you start to have suicidal feelings again, promise me you’ll call this number: 1-800-273-8255, if you are in the United States. They also have a chat feature that always has someone there to respond.
God is for you! John, you can get through this, and it will be hard work, but it’s worth it. Remember the strength you have in Christ – Romans 8 can remind you (can you go read that right now?). The cross of Jesus Christ IS strong enough to overcome everything. Even this.
Peace, Chris
I am trying to stop watching porn, It’s not an easy task, I can for sure say that. I am glad I found this site and to know I am not the only one in this situation.
Hey !!
Just throw your phone away at night ,keep a phon having no internet connection if u need!!
Wake up in morning with God ,do some japa , or read scriptures for 2 hour
Again before sleeping at night 1 hour read scripture or do japa
Believe in lord ,and remember God can be achieved only by devotion, when your heart will be filled with devotion you will have become so strong to destroy this problem!!
I am also suffering with this situation just like the many who have posted here. I just want to be able to express it out, it’s really hard for me to tell it to the people close to me. I’ve prayed for this many times and have tried stopping but I always end up doing it again… if anyone could pray for me… help I don’t want to be in this situation forever… I really want to stop this and want to be able to fully grow my journey with God.
I think Prayers and Faith in Jesus can set you Free. But we have to remember that God can be silent for very long. we just have to wait and have faith in his timings!
Its tough. I pray for strength against temptation and evil. As a male, there are reminders everyplace youlook. Billboards with Women in small bikinis, commercials that are racy, even women on Christian TV with super tight clothing on. Is this thier fault? No, but its a constant struggle to walk clean vs the constant reminder Satan is throwing at you. Ive never cheated on my Wife, but I know looking at porn is the same. Jesus said just thinking it is the same as adultry. Its a constant fight. I pray for help everyday, but its like Im Satans puppet as he laughs at me.
Any prayer would be great.
Please pray for me I have been addicted to porn for a very long time . I break free of it once in awhile but like a dog I return to my vomit. I feel sad about it I have spoken to my brother about it and he is going to become my accountability partner . But I need help please pray for me I will pray for y’all this sin is an obimibatiob and Christ can over come I know it …
I don’t even know how many years I have been struggling with porn. When I was saved and I read in the Bible that lust and sin was wrong, I threw all my porn away and went on with a fresh start. Over the years time, my eye caught a sexual image and I got ensnared right back into it. I felt horrible, and then over time I just become numb to to these images and now I just reached a point in which I feel that I can’t stop it and there is no way out. I know that the Devil is lying to me, ( big surprise there)
I know that it is wrong, and I always say Lord Help me to stop this….and then I go right back into it again, over and over. I know that being intimate with my wife and having sexual purity is what God wants and I need prayer and a group that I can get with to pray over this. Sometimes I feel that if I died right now, God would love me and forgive me as he always has, but I think he might have his reasons as to why I have not become everything I should become.
I also need prayer..I’m 13 years old and embarrased about this situation..I donno who to talk to😔
Hi, Mordecai, thank you for having the guts to post here. You’re taking to someone right now :) Have you found any forums that might help if you want to keep the discussion more private? I’ll be really honest with you – I don’t know that you would be able to fully defeat pornography alone. It’s just really, really rare that someone can do that. I’d like to encourage you to tell at least one of your parents. Is that possible? I can help you with what to say, if you’re willing to try. Let me know (email below).
Regards,
Chris
chris.mckenna@covenanteyes.com
Hi firends, I feel much better knowing that there is a lot of people who is struggling with the same problem that I am. I’m form Mexico. I´m a single man and I was married two times, my last wife leave me because my adiction to the pornography. I’m looking for help, I want another chance to live my life according the God’s will. I do not know what I must to do but I do not want to continue being a slave. Please give me some advices. Help me to know that I’m not alone in this struggle. Sorry about my writing mistakes, I don’t speak english very well. God bless you firends.
I posted a comment saying that watching porn and masturbation are normal for men, unless it becomes all-consuming. I also said that this advice from conservative Christians that are NOT doctors with legitimate credentials. My post was deleted. Did I hurt someone’s book sales, perhaps? So much for open discourse, eh?
Hi, Gulagg – no, we’re not like that. I simply fell behind on a few posts over the holidays, but I believe I have accepted that comment, and I’ve now also accepted this one where you tried to pick a fight. No problem. I’d be happy to have open discourse about the statement in your previous post once you provide me the “clinical studies” that conclude that men require ejaculation every 72 hours or their testicles explode. Thanks!
Chris
See as christians, we shouldn’t conform to the norms of this world. So what’s acceptable for the world is destructive for the child of God.
Isnt it obvious that the individuals who are speaking out about their struggle here on this page arent happy to be bound to addiction they hate the idea that they are disadvantaging themselves and are blocking their destinies and want out.
So why are you expecting us to welcome your discouraging views with open arms?
Please i desperately need help .I have been in this shameful act for 8 years now.I hold a position in church,this act judges my position as a Christian people look up to. I have tried possible ways to stop but hasn’t.Now I declare I am a porn addict,please help me
Hi, Ernest – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. Can I ask some direct questions? What have you tried when you say, “I have tried possible ways to stop but hasn’t”? Have you gotten rid of your phone? Do you have accountability in your life? Have you made a clear and effective decision about this sin? You will not be able to break free unless you’re willing to do whatever it takes to break free. Counseling, dumb phone, whatever it takes! Are you willing to do that?
Chris
Firstly, change your confession, start declaring that you’re not an addict and that you’re gonna conquer this problem. Secondly, Fast and pray over the matter, you can try a partial dry fast from 6 am to 6pm and use prayer points like,’Holy Spirit fill me up with self control to overcome the flesh and its desires’ or ‘Lord God deliver me from this porn addiction’ and I kid you not, you’re gonna see a change.
I am a teenager but due to technology i have a laptop in which i use in watching porn anytime i return for vaccation i have tried to prepare a time table to help keep me busy at all times but the billboards and pictures that are posted on the roads always reminds me anytime i walk on the road.Infact it let me sin anytime i return home
I pray everyday for forgiveness of sins but by time i realise i do the same thing again. I put my trust in JESUS by praying and reading my bible but still i cannot stop it.
Hi, Joel – I’m sorry that you’re struggling. Can I ask some direct questions? What have you tried? Have you gotten rid of your phone? Do you have accountability in your life? Have you made a clear and effective decision about this sin? You will not be able to break free unless you’re willing to do whatever it takes to break free. Counseling, dumb phone, whatever it takes! Are you willing to do that? If you’re not willing to “pluck out your eye,” and only “kinda want to quit looking,” then you will continue to fail.
Chris
The advise that I can give someone who feels trapped by porn addiction and other addiction is simple, don’t underestimate the matter, to be honest you’re in bondage but Jesus Christ can break that bondage, just pray and fast over the matter all in the name of seeking deliverance and believe that God will remedy, see God wants to see you free and delivered, do away with the condemnation. Shalom
Does anyone know of a forum or support/accountability group for Christian women with this problem? I haven’t found one. Judging from these comments, there seems to be a need for something like that. Also, my problem is with sexually explicit writing rather than pictures or videos. Does anyone else battle against that? For every person in these comments who asked for prayer, I am asking the Lord to deliver us from this temptation, and from the shame and self-loathing that comes from it.
Check into the groups at XXXChurch.
And remember that you are perfectly and completely loved, no matter what.
I’m a Christian Jedi, we don’t have these problems. But I hope all of you will find the help that you need! Rockatoa, Brickticks out!
Pls pray for me am really stuggling with porn addiction I need God to help me through it all. I know he will
Pls pray for me too. Im struggling to stop
Please pray for me, I now know that am addicted to porn and I beg God for forgiveness. Am also hopeful that one day I will be free from it, if the Lord let us live. May God in his infinite mercy set me free in Jesus name. Amen
I have been struggling with that addiction for about 6 long years… and i began to hate myself more and more. Please pray for…. I’m so tired of this…i want to be free
Hello, Sasha – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. What have you tried?
I am 20 years old and I have been struggling with this addiction for 3 years. I confess my sins to you and hereby I proclaim in the holy name of Jesus that I am free of this sin. It will be hard, but I can do all things through Christ that strengthen me!!!
My name is Sean I’m 17 years old and have been addicted to porn ever since I was 13. Started off small but then became daily. I pray all the time for the strength to be ride of it, and from time to time I go days without it. However, the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak, thus my natural biology and sexual desires tempt me into porn. I’ve always known telling others would help as god gives us that truth. But I’m so scared to tell due to the reactions from family. I have tried before with nonchristian freinds, as most kids my age tend to be,but they’ve made it seem so merge. It’s been so hard to not want it denying its pleasure makes it harder to stop. Like all things it’s there for a reason but not for masturbation. I have many reasons to quit, God’s conmand alone is enough but I can’t control myself. God has acted on my prayers before and reviled much to me. I want kids when I get married and the prospect of not being able to produce my own children scares me. There are of course other alternatives but sin is sin. No matter how small or prevalent it may be I feel its effects daily even trying to tell myself no and even in the act I remind myself of what I should have done. I offer my pain and my loneliness to god as he will provide. Such as this, this text I pray will be one of the opertunitys I’ve been provide and search for, that may finally put a break to this. I thank you for reading, and pray for all of you.
Hi everyone my name is Abel, i was addicted to porn went i was 12 years old and am 25years now am seriourly struggling to get ride of this but it hard to resist please i need prayers and support, these act is eating my heart and coursing depression to me. it even went to an extend that if i don’t maturbate i dnt feel ok. please pray for me my life is running out of control please i need help.
Hello, Abel – I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. What have you tried? Do you still have internet access? Are you really willing to do whatever it takes to quit? This blog post has 6 Essentials for breaking free.
But, it might simply come down to you making the conscious commitment to wanting to quit.
I hope this doesn’t come across as insensitive. It’s just that many people that come to our blog looking for help have never had someone tell them to make a decision. That’s right – make the decision to quit. And, then do whatever it takes to support that decision. I can’t make it for you. If that means throwing away your phone, then throw it away. If you say you “life is running out,” then your life is worth far more than a phone. Does that mean finding new friends? Then, find new friends. Do whatever it takes! This is a battle. No soldier “kinda” goes into battle. It’s after training, with weapons, and fully committed. Otherwise, you get destroyed. And, that’s what will happen unless you’re fully committed.
I’m rooting for you! If there’s a voice inside your head saying “you’re not strong enough,” or “you’ll never make it,” then scream in a pound voice, “LIAR!” because that’s not true. I’m living this way right now. Then, turn to God, and watch His Holy Spirit turbo-charge your commitment and give you strength you didn’t know was possible. Too many people pray to God for the strength to quit. And, then wait around and do nothing until He answers. That doesn’t work. Pray and then GO! Fight! Decide! And, you watch Him strengthen your actions. Grace-driven effort.
Chris
Hello everyone,
We have just read the above article for a reason. We all are seeking help! We all want to rid our lives of this drug! We want to better our lives with our family and friends, but most importantly, our God!
My name is Jason I’m now 30, I was first intorduced to porn by one of my sister’s boyfriend’s when I was 14, but didn’t start watching it religiously until I joined the military and was on my first deployment at the age of 20. I stayed a virgin until the age of 19, and then I found the “high” one gets from sex. While I was deployed I realized I could give myself the “high” and didn’t need a woman to get it. I was hooked and I can actually remember what video I was addicted to because I wanted my wife and I (got married at age 24) to reenact it, which was some role play. She was not a sexual person but her love for me gave her a sacrificial heart and she wore what I wanted her too. As our marriage went on I found myself watching again, but mostly after we had children and she no longer felt confident with her body. I found women who were, both porn and in person.
I confronted her with what I thought was her problem. Her and I would have sex about once to twice a month. I told her my eyes were wondering, which made her feel bad. I didn’t realize until today, the problem was actually me! It’s much easier to place the blame on someone else, especially when us reading this are the one at fault, we just don’t want to admit it. My wife and I will be divorced in a couple of weeks, not sure if my addiction played a role or not, but I believe in myself it did. I know have custody of our two boys and don’t want the sins of my youth to be passed to them. This addiction is a horrible one and can tear families apart.
13 Is any among you afflicted? let him pray. Is any merry? let him sing psalms.
16 Confess your faults one to another, and pray one for another, that ye may be healed. The effectual fervent prayer of a righteous man availeth much.
James 5:13, 16 KJV
https://bible.com/bible/1/jas.5.13-16.KJV
My name is James I’m 15 years old I’m chistian-catholic and I’v e been suffering porn addiction for 3 years since I was in my 6th Grade porn made a massive impact in my life. It started when I’m watching the anime One Piece (I don’t blame it I watch it because the story was very very good I’m just telling that there is some not good content in it) still I watch it and read it every week. there is some sexual content shown there like beautiful women taking a bath and while watching it I felt aroused by it and it lead me to viewing nude pics of anime girls and I’m saying to my self “I’m only doing it to know about sex” and it continues until it leads to watching videos and masturbation
I prayed for it many times everyday to stop but it can’t. I always keep expecting that it will be gone away if I pray for it many times but it just can’t.it still continued I watch different genre of videos then I discovered gay stuff in porn and it questions my sexuality and asked myself “Do I really like guys” and then I realized I’m gay and It adds to my troubles, burdens and worries because what if my family knows about it are they going to disown me, desert me and I’m christian-catholic how will I handle that.
and because of that I became humiliated and embarassed to myself I lost my dignity and all my confidence It changes my decisions in life I decided not to have kids not to have a partner and did something I never thought I could have done that leads me to arguing with my family and loved ones and affects my relation ship with them I never hang out with my friends and my time with them decrease I became late for practices and activities because I was too busy watching porn it always lead me to the wrong ways in my life
I always deny about my sexual sins and every time I deny about that it devastates me I think that it only adds to my sins and think that there is no forgiveness for what I’ve even though I pray a trillion times I always said to myself “you don’t deserve to live”,” you’re more worthy dead” I became depressed I always think about killing myself EVERYDAY but I can’t because I thought that God will not accept me to his kingdom I’m to dirty and disgusting for him But I know he don’t think like that I know he always forgives me most of the time I forgot because Insiditme I can’t feel that he forgive me.
There is also a time that I discovered my cousins and Father watches porn to and I always blame and said to myself “This is my fault God is punishing me for what I’ve done”
I always feel very very down that I couldn’t anything to fix our problem our family are not very open about talking about sexes
Continuation:
I don’ know how to help them I don’t even know how to help myself I became terrified to be who I am because I fear that whole world will judge me because I’m gay even if I did nothing they bash and insult me Maybe I’m gay but I will choose not to marry a man because It s wrong or woman because I don’t her love to be wasted.
I just want to tell you how pornography affected me, my choices, my relationships to God and to my loved ones, and my life. I really need good words and advices for me Please Help me and Pray for me and my Family God Bless
Hi James,
First of all, I want to say thank you for writing in so bravely, at age 15. I think that shows what a person of courage and conviction you are.
Second, I want to say thank you for not harming yourself, even though you may have been tempted at times. You are God’s gift to this world, and we need to you here, just as you are.
Third, the shame that you experience around sexuality in general, porn in general, and then around homosexuality are probably the bigger issues than pornography itself. Shame becomes a driving factor in addictive-type behaviors, and working to overcome that shame is just as necessary as making behavioral changes like installing Covenant Eyes, finding an accountability partner, etc. Here’s a short animation I made on interrupting shame cycles, which might help as you think this through.
Fourth, I want to tell you that being gay is NOT a sin. I know that if you could make any other choice about your sexuality, you would, right? As a Catholic Christian, you would never ever choose this. I’m a therapist, I’ve worked with lots of gay Christians, and I have yet to come across one single gay Christian who wanted to be gay. Your sexual orientation is NOT a choice, it’s NOT a sin. You are precious and perfect just as you are, sexual orientation and all. I would encourage you to visit Q Christian Fellowship where you can find gay Christians living whole, holy lives.
Peace to you,
Kay
I have read majority of the thoughts and articles pasted here, it’s been very interesting, feels like my own history narrated by someone else; mine story is not so different from yours except my faith and religion is different from you. I am a Muslim by religion and have faith in Allah. I was introduced with porn once there was no internet rather there were VHS tapes. Like one of my friend told here same goes with me. I joined military in the officer cadre at age 21 and was deployed on an isolated location far away from any city and I was unmarried. I used to watch porn videos on video cassette recorders i.e. VCR. I got married to the love of my life at 26, initially I went away from porn being newlywed and strenuous military routine kept me away from porn but I shifted to masturbation than porn. Now, I am 48 still happily married for 22 years with three kids and my eldest is daughter she studies in a university she is 21 now and I am still addicted to porn. Like one of the friend above said that men do require a sexual release after every 72 hours same goes for me. My wife knows and preempt my next move like she is my soul mate and is always reluctant but finally gives up in my sexual fantasy and we watch porn together but I get orgasm and she just help me get out of this situation all the time. We make love once or twice a month but my watching of porn never stops. With the access of high speed Internet this porn watching and resulting in masturbation is my routine since long I mean very long it’s been over 25 years. After each episode I bow down to my Lord ask for forgiveness feels sorry for my sins but the circle repeats itself after every 72 hours without fail. Now, I am a retired army officer living peacefully with my wife and three kids this porn watching is like a habit just like smoking I always failed to quit. I need direction and counseling to eliminate this habit and wants to get rid of it for good. My wife sometimes gets irritated on me watching porn but she loves me a lot. I gave her an excellent lifestyle with all amnesties including house, cars and what all any woman could dream for but I am still a porn addict so can you help!!!!
Hello! Thank you for coming to us. Have you tried some essential steps to breaking free? It first begins with a sincere desire to quit: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2012/04/23/how-to-quit-porn-6-essential-steps/
I have been hooked on porn since I was about 13. I am turning 35 this year. So many times have I prayed fervently for God to just take away this desire to look at porn and masturbate, but time and again I keep doing it. I eventually got to a point where I realized, being male, we have a high sex drive due to constant sperm accumulation in our bodies. If you do not look at porn or masturbate, then what? You will go out and have one night stands – either way you are committing a sin – in the words of Jesus you will be condemned to hell. First of all, this seems really unfair. Our bodies were designed this way, to have this constant sexual pressure, to make matters worse we are in a world where sex and scantily clad women are everywhere. Are we just supposed to wait for a wet dream? What about what we dream of? All three ways end up in sin. It really doesn’t make any sense at all. My partner passed away last week from cancer. Our sexual relationship was good up until the point she was too weak when it started getting bad. What is a man like me supposed to do? I adopted her two children from her first marriage (the dad passed away a long time ago) and we also have a son together. I will not be able to be in another relationship for a few years to not affect them. Until then, I have sperm building up in me all the time, I need a release. Seriously what am I supposed to do to release the sexual tension?
Hello, Jay – my heart is crushed by your situation. Truly. I want to be delicate, because I just can’t relate to the situation you’re in. I’m not going to tell you not to masturbate. So, what does that mean? Can you masturbate without sinning? Christians love to argue about this question. I honestly don’t know. I’ve just decided to let each person answer this one for him/herself. Covenant Eyes does not have an official stance on masturbation. Also, please find an amazing counselor. Stay connected to an amazing group of friends. Stay abundantly active. About porn, I guess my words would be to please stay away. It’s too slippery of a slope. Especially right now. Daily commitments. Daily bread. It has to be possible, right? I mean, it has to be possible to live porn-free, or Jesus died for nothing. I’m far from perfect, but I have to try and internalize the truth that my struggle is not so big as to make the cross powerless. It must be possible to live in freedom. Otherwise, Christ came for nothing.
Jay, may God give you abundant grace. May that grace guide your efforts. And, may your efforts succeed.
Peace,
Chris
Hi I’m 23 years old guy. I think I’m addicted to porn. My friends taught me about porn. when I was a 14 year old boy i saw first porn video. When I saw that first time I was scared of nude women’s body from the video.. After that porn became part of me. I watched lots of porn videos and photos to know more about girls. I watched porn daily all the day and night without sleep without going to school without studying without going for marriage functions. I did masturbation daily all the day and night by watching porn. I don’t talk to anyone i don’t talk to girls because I’m scared of girls. I was a smart boy but after i saw porn i lost my confidence and becomes shy type.
Now I’m 23, waiting for job and marriage. I’m scared about my life and my upcoming life partner. I reduced the amount of watching porn, i reduced the amount of masturbation. But I’m still watching porn and masturbating once a week , I’m still worried about my life. Am i a porn Addict? Please tell me I really need to know and want to quit porn fully.
Hi, Akshay – I don’t think the word “addiction” is helpful. Whether I call you a porn addict or not doesn’t change your situation. Here’s what you’re saying (I’ll just repeat it back) – your life is better without porn. You don’t want to bring porn and habitual masturbation into your marriage. These are both good and noble desires that I applaud. So, will you do whatever it takes to get rid of it? Don’t get married until things are better. Talk to a spiritual advisor or counselor. Someone to help you unwind 9 years of behavior that has taught your brain a lot of untrue things about sex and orgasm. Take a 90-day fast from everything. Maybe get rid of some devices that a tempting. Those are a few tips that I’ll leave with you. None of them are easy, but you can’t take the easy road if you want t live porn-free. Porn is a beast that is only satisfied with ALL of you and it will stop at nothing to try and get it.
Peace,
Chris
Hi chris, if I were to marry it would be twenty five years old. I stopped watching pornography. Now I think I’ve changed a lot more than before. Because I have reduced watching porn and masturbation as I mentioned earlier.
Now I’m not scared of girls. That was old me. that was 9 years ago. The main reason I left comment: I had to know if I was a porn Addict That’s why I asked about it. I think I’m now mature enough to my life.
I’m new now. Porn is very bad for life. its destroying our lives
By the way thank you for your advice.
Can you tell me more.? .
Hello, Akshay, you’re on the right path of striving forward, learning from the past, and trying not to repeat past mistakes. If you’ve stopped (which is amazing!), then try to put as many controls in place as possible to keep porn away. Get controls on the devices. Talk opening with people you trust. Stay close to the Lord. Wak up each day ready to fight. And, when temptation comes, write it down so that you can start to identify patterns of when the enemy is coming after you. He’s constantly changing tactics. But, you can keep changing your tactics, too. I’m happy for you and wish you all the best.
Chris
As I read this article, I feel a huge guilt upon me. Part of me doesn’t even believe that I am His because I keep failing Him. Everyday I want to get closer to Him and surrender. I get so angry because whenever I fail… I cry out to Him and ask for forgiveness. But then, I got right back to it just like you said in the article “dog returning to it’s own vomit.” I am sick and tired of asking for forgiveness but then going right back. I know prayer and fasting works, because I’ve done it before. Now, it’s hard, because I work intense hours and any alone time I get at home, it goes into pornography and just my mind thinking about very horrible and sexual images. I need help and I know I do. I don’t have anyone to talk to because I truly don’t know people, locally. All those who are my brothers and sisters in Christ, are from other states and are limited with assistance. I want to honor God in all that I do… I don’t even want to preach to others anymore because I have this hidden and dark secret. All my old habits, I have done away with, through Christ but why is porn the hardest?? Doesn’t the word say that where temptation is uncommon to man, the Lord gives us a way out?? I use to drink, but no longer will I touch alcohol because I know that’s what the Lord doesn’t approve. I don’t smoke anymore because that’s definitely poison in the body. I no longer curse because I know it’s wrong and I feel convicted. Heck, even if I say one, I’ll cry out and repent. But with porn… it’s like a sick habit that needs to be done or else I’ll go crazy. Help me… I don’t want to do it but my flesh does…
Hi, Joshua – I’m sorry that you’re hurting. I can sense the depth of your pain in your post. Will you allow me to be really direct? In the last sentence, you said, “I don’t want to do it,” but you still allow internet access in your home? On your device? How are you getting to the porn? If you can’t handle having the internet around after your long days, then you have to find another way. You know the definition of insanity, right? Doing the same things and expecting different results. Or, don’t go home after those long days. Go to a friend’s house or somewhere safer. You know your situation best. In the end, if you really want to quit, then you’ll really do whatever it takes to quit. Porn only need a sliver of opportunity. It sounds like you need to remove as many of those slivers as possible because your will power and resolve alone are not enough.
I wish you the best! God is for you. May His grace strengthen you.
Chris
please I really need help , am so addicted to porn I really want to leave it alone but whenever I try the thought keeps coming back , I want to stop porn I hate it .
please help me
Fair or not fair.
God will not remove temptation from any of his children.
Remember, Jesus was tempted, the apostles were tempted.
What are we to God if we cave to every temptation.
There might be some miracle cases of sex addiction being removed but that wouldn’t mean that some other addiction won’t take it’s place. I found that when you resolve one addiction another will kick in.
If your an addict (including sex addicts) or alcoholic, go to a 12 step program ( I have never been to a sex anonymous meeting, it sounds dangerous, but I don’t know).
I think the AA meetings would work. They have open meetings and you don’t have to be an alcoholic to attend. You can go there and benefit from that.
I am an Alcoholic, I know how AA worked with my drinking. I have 37 years of sobriety.
Meetings help me with keep everything in balance.
Living the 12 step program is inline with Christianity. Continue going to church but get a 12 step program incorporated into your life.
Greg
Hello there
I am a 26 years old male, I have been watching porn since I was 12 years old all because I am & I was alone and adventures.
The best I have done was to hold myself for 14 days and it was awesome. I felt my self in that period.
When I am doing it, My will power goes to shit & I can’t control my self not doing something stupid or nothing at all and it does prevent me from getting up and doing something great and helpful to myself and mylife.
It has nothing to do with religious, hell or heaven or something like that.
Just know that we came to this world with couple of cards in our hands if we play them right we are the winners, if not we definitely are the losers.
One of those cards specially for men is urge to release the energy they have. If we use it in the right way it is a delight and success.
I guess the problem is that we use it excessively like any other situations. going extreme in any activity is bad I guess.
Eating too much food, being too much religious and so on not only it hurts us it will hurt people around us.
I haven’t played my cards right so far, watching porn and Masturbation has become one part of my life that is too extra like a freaking cancer. If I could cure & fight it I could live again if not it is just going to eat me alive and leave me with nothing just regret.
Some people say it is natural. if it was natural with no harm believe me nobody would argue or talk about it much.
The good news is that I never gave up nor I could let it go. but deep down I know I am trying.
I will keep trying and trying one day I look back at this moments and either I see that I have won or lost which is all up to me.
From now on I am not looking at watching porn or masterbation like it is natural or part of our lives I am going to know that is should be part of my successful life and when I look back and see that I could do it 30 years from now I feel proud.
If there is any tips that could help more please share
Porn is so dragging me from advancing my spiritual living which i really want enhanced…i got hooked into this sin when i was 7.Now i am 27 and its still digging me up.yes!! 20yrs…i really need help guys
Hi, help starts with taking a serious step of commitment. Here are some steps you can take (others have tried these and they work): https://www.covenanteyes.com/2012/04/23/how-to-quit-porn-6-essential-steps/
Chris
I want to ask God to forgive me also. I seem to watch and masturbate to porn when my wife wont have sex with me. We have two kids and things aren’t like they used to be.
I am asking for prayer because i hate it after, and i want to be right with God. I dont watch porn daily or weekly but still need to be strong.
God I really need your help.
I kind of given up, not mad at God, mad at myself, I cant do this because I am so isolated and I just don’t care anymore! I am going to burn in the lake of fire for it, because I am too weak! I am just tired, tired of trying to change this addiction but cannot seem to stop!
Craig, I’m proud of you for admitting your struggles. It takes tremendous courage to do so. You can overcome this. If you need someone to talk to, please call our customer service at 877.479.1119
Am stanley,i struggled with porn for years but to no avail,i tried everything possible…but finally by the grace of the almighty God am free from porn addict…i got myself involved into bible based society…i read the word of God everyday…that was how porn addict vanished…you too can get rid of it…read your bible everyday,gradually porn addict will vanish….never get tired trying to stop that dirty act….you will make it in Jesus name Amen!
Hello Stanley. I’m glad to know you have overcome your porn addiction. I’m struggling with it for some years now. I will pray and read my bible seriously now. Please uphold me in your prayers. I will definitely overcome porn in Jesus name. Amen.
I was raised in a christian family. I’ve been so active in church since i was a kid. My porn addiction started when I was a high school student. I have experienced sexual behaviors with my cousins, they taught me those lustful behaviors which i find so addictive. And it’s not just my problem, my problem is i am attracted to my same sex. I know all these are a big sin and i can’t help but to always ask for forgiveness to God and then after a week i can’t hold it anymore and i just give up and turn to porn again. It’s a tiring cycle and I think God is angry to me for abusing His grace.
I’ve been struggling with this burden for the past 15 odd years and I have noticed how it has rubbed off on my relationship with people especially women.its been so bad I often used to think why God wouldn’t permit us to have just one Vice with no ramifications or judgement(pornography would definitely have been the answer).These days I don’t get the same satisfaction I used to when I watch it ,but I still find myself committing this abomination because it is literally just right there and a click away. I wish I had never experienced it in the first place because this is by far the hardest battle I’ve had to deal with as a Christian. I pray the Grace of God does not depart from me eventually.
i really need help, i’m a nigerian who has struggled with porn for years, sometimes it all stops and when i think im free i feel the urge to watch pornography again, i dont know what else to do, i’ve fasted and prayed severally. sometimes even after my prayers i still find myself watching pornography, i just wished i was never born rather than sinning against God and sometimes i doubt God’s presence in my life, i feel unworthy to go for fellowships because i just feel that i am pretending about my christianity, I dont want God to leave me because i really love Him but i cant just help myself even after the prayers, it’s now as if i can never be delivered. I really don’t have anyone i can talk to because i’m an introvert and this is my first time ever sharing this.
I just don’t want to lose God.
Thank you so much for your comment. You are valuable behind measure! Please let us know what we can do to help.
Been looking at porn since I was 7. Exposed to it by my friend who’s uncle gave him a few copies of a certain magazine. After that I went down to our little hiding spot and looked at it often…I was molested I was pushed to have sex with a little girl when I was 10 she was about 8 and her mother and my uncle had intercourse in front of us as we tried to play and swim in the local river they were only a few feet away from us…when they finished they wanted us to do it to..but WE DID NOT! I never told anyone about that day but it along with grandfather watching porn with me when nobody else was around pushed me out of control. I was molested by a few 2 of whom I don’t think knew better my brother was a year older than me and my cousin got me to come to his house one night I was about 11-12 and he tried to get me to drink beer with him and it wasn’t long before he was in his underwear. I got super bad vibes and decided to not stay the night and it drink beer with him. His dad was a big pervert and would watch porn in from of us now and then. As a small child I was made to masturbate an older man and was also laid on top of a woman in a manner that placed me inside her…there are just a few things I live with I am now 42 and have been married and put my wife through a lot of pain…I have come out and told her I need help but she calls me a sicko and batters me for weeks over it….I have 2 wonderful daughter my oldest which is now 24 has been my help she knows everything about me and my past and is trying to help me since I really have nobody else I still struggle with it I love women in a way that makes me want more of them I cannot simply see and attractive clean woman and not want to have more….IT IS A VERY VERY INTENSE STRUGGLE FOR ME! I have been suicidal I have often thought of hanging myself im ashamed I hate who I am and my secret self…I have stopped going to church, because when I do filth fills my mind and sex with some of those ladies are all that stays on my mind…I have prayed I have begged I have pleaded I have confessed and nothing happens my many darks desire unfold while my wife is fast asleep 😭 I need help I need somebody as I am fast slipping down a dark and scary tunnel at a high rate of speed and keep reaching for somebody’s hand to help me to reach out and pull me up again…I love my wife so much and I go to work and often cry at my disgust over myself and how I’ve treated my wife….My daughters I feel do not need to know about this part of me although I have revealed it to my oldest that is doing her best to help me…I used to go to church and have stopped I use to read my bible but have gotten rebellious against our father and have decided maybe I’m Just a sex slave here for these demons enjoyment and God has seen me mess up so much that maybe just maybe he has decided to leave me in the wilderness cause he is tired of messing with a complete failure and disgrace suck as me….somebody help me please my life literally hangs in the balance as each day goes by I think of quick easy ways to get rid of this poor excuse of a life …I used to care about t it hurting my kids but I don’t care anymore I’d be forgotten in a week…God is letting me go and I’m now passed caring if he loves me or not…It hurt me tremendously to think God may have just pushed me aside and allowed me to be good for those wolves at the gate..please help??anyone?? Save my life please?i hate my existence and have nobody here.
Kenneth,
Your story breaks my heart. You’ve suffered a great deal of abuse as a child, and I’m not hearing you say that you’ve ever had therapy for that.
Please, please, please, FIND A THERAPIST who is trauma-informed, and experienced in helping clients heal from child sexual abuse. There is help and hope for you.
The National Suicide Prevention Hotline is available 24 hours a day at 1-800-273-8255. A chat line is also available 24/7.
You are a valuable person, and there is healing and hope, I promise.
Kay
I started watching porn at a very young age, I really can’t remember, my elder sister and I found it on our uncle’s phone,anytime he comes to visit, in the night we’ll take his phone and watch porn.
As I grew older, I started watching it occasionally but it wasn’t that bad when I was in high school cause I was in hostel-a boarding school. But when I come home I go back to watching it, then I stopped for a long time-everytime I watch porn or see any kind of porn related picture or animation, I make myself have an orgasm so I feel bad about it and blame myself, then I delete it and pray to God to forgive me of my sins and even promise not to do it again sometimes I pray to God to inflict pain on me so I’d stop, but I still go back to my sins.
I’m in university now and I still haven’t stopped, I’m addicted to it and I can’t even tell anyone, I’m ashamed I can even do such, I thought I was the only one, I made a promise to God and even tried to resist temptations but today I just went back to it, I even started by reading romance novels to downloading porn because the romance novels didn’t help my ‘desire’, so after doing this I deleted the novels, the videos, and my browsing history too(like always) so I decided to seek spiritual help about watching porn and how to stop, I felt terrible seeing the sins on watching porn-I’m a Christian – so I came across this page and read alot of comments and I felt it’s okay to let it out maybe it would help me overcome this. I’ve prayed to God to help me overcome this, I really want to stop. I’m a female
Reply to @Heri:
You aren’t the only one to pray a prayer like this:
“I pray to God to inflict pain on me so I’d stop, but I still go back to my sins”
But God hadn’t inflicted any pain upon me and through his Grace he saved me.
I know how it felt guilty(after masturbation) , and again forget that shamefulness and commiting the same sin again.
It’s like this: (“Getting bad thoughts”->”Masturbating”->”Feeling guilty”->”Forgetting shame”->”Getting Horny again”)
Once I (as usual)wanted to quit porn during the pain of my guiltyness. Since even though I stayed away from it(pornography), I had those thoughts. I wanted to stop those thoughts in the first place. So I started to say myself that I should hate porn , and often I prayed to God in the name of my Lord Jesus Christ about that ,explaining how I can’t bear that pain and to help me out from this addiction. As the Days passed I’ve got a little prayerful. Even though I’ve had Lustful dreams(by demons in my view) at night I could able to resist my hornyness. Soon after then the devil left my mind.
I’ve felt true love and peace.I had a lot of good dreams of me being in mysterious places. I’ve started reading scripture. Learned a little. And still needed to learn a lot from God.
By his might he saved me. It’s been an year since I masturbated (not me but devil in me made me do that).Now that addiction is gone(Gaming too). I should serve Lord from now on.
Glory to God the Father and Lord Jesus Christ My King.
I am a 18 year old girl who has watched porn on and off for roughly 4 years now. It started as curiosity, I would watch it because I’ve never seen anything like it before…then it led to masturbation. It’s a struggle, I know it’s bad. I was raised in a religious family, I’ve known my ENTIRE life that it is bad, yet I could never stop myself completely. There have been times where I’ve gone as long as three months without it…but then I relapse.
I have faith in God that I will break the cycle for good, I just need to buckle down completely…. and I admit I’ve been slacking.
For all of you out there struggling besides me, we can do this with God’s help.
My God is a merciful God and reading this post has pushed to try even harder to quit and be normal again.
I say normal because before my porn addiction, my thoughts weren’t clouded with sex and masturbation. I want to revert back to that state so bad. I wish this process wasn’t so hard. But despite the effort, it’s worth it.
THANKS SO MUCH FOR THIS PRICELESS HELP,AM FEELING RELIEVED ALREADY,THANK YOU
I am a mish kid, when I moved back to the west all the people in my class was talking about that stuff. I never really fitted in with anyone. That is why I thought I had to be like the other kids to fit in. Well, 1 year later and I am still addicted. Well on and off. I have a graet group of friends now and I did not know why I still felt I had to continue. Well, God has put his loving arms around me and all of you. Together, we all can get threw this!
I am a Christian who has struggled on and off with porn since I was a teen. Oh sure you can smash your computer and flush your smartphone down the toilet, but it won’t help. And while I agree accountability and community are important in beating any addiction the truth is it’s not enough. The times I have gone the long stretches with no perversion is when I was in a deep intimate relationship with God. As people we desire intimate relationship and we are meant to have a deep meaningful relationship with our creator. David says in Psalm 42 and I paraphrase, “the deep things in me cry out to the deep things in you God!” I would spend ample time in prayer and in the word every morning making a heart felt honest connection with God and being honest with him. I would pour out my heart. Telling him deep things about me that no one knows (of course he already knows) I would sit quiet and let Him respond to my heart. He would give me this intense love for people and I would pray for whoever He would bring to my mind. I would read the Bible and the words would jump off the page and run over my soul like warm oil. (Sorry only way to describe the sensation) We were in this amazing relationship that brought fulfillment and joy. Even though I would still struggle with porn, I would still seek God every morning knowing that even my righteousness as the Bible says, is as filthy rags compared to his holiness. I’m only made holy because of Jesus and not by my own self-righteous acts. When I would mess up I just felt God say “it’s covered. I just want to spend time with you.” I began to realize something very important, it’s God coming close to me that makes me holy and not me trying to do God a big favor by destroying my computer every time I messed up. Perversion began to leave as I began to get a high spending time with God. It’s like it took the place of the porn over time. I liked being able to talk to young women without feeling like a perve or having the guilt draped on me like a heavy wet blanket. I could walk down the street in the summer and was able to hold my head high despite all the naked flesh around me. It was unbeleivable freedom. I went a good two years like that but got distracted by work, ministry ambitions, and people pleasing. In other words I began to get self-righteous. I stopped having a deep daily connection with God and the desire for porn came right back.
I have slipped but I’m getting right back up. After all it is called the “fight of faith” for a reason. So please. Get back up and don’t quit. Jesus paid the price so we can come to God anytime. It’s our own religious pride that keeps us from God. There is no waiting period. Jesus took care of it 2000 years ago. So get back up without delay and keep fighting. Don’t believe the lie that your sin keeps you from God after all we sin sometimes without even realizing it. Develop relationship. He’s your Savior, King, Father, and Best Friend. He wants to be in your world in every way and isn’t afraid of your sexuality. After all he created it.
Thanks for sharing that Jim.
Thanks for sharing your experience here. God bless you
I can’t stop watching porn I need your help please
Hello James,
I’m so sorry that you’re struggling. Know that you are not alone with your struggle. Others are going through what you are going through.
Have you ever seen the movie Oblivion? Those machines that tell the remaining humans a lie and then suck the life out of the planet? Porn sucks the
life out of those it infects. It tells a lot of great lies about satisfaction, love, intimacy. All false. It is a jealous issue. It won’t share your time, attention, life,
desires, dreams, goals or future with anything else. It wants it all. You were made for MORE. Your life isn’t over yet. You have more power and ability than you think. Porn wants you to feel powerless. B.S. You can beat this, but it won’t be easy, and it will probably get worse before it gets better. So, you’ll need friends who can pick you up and give you pep talks like this.
Here are a few free resources to help you along the way: https://www.covenanteyes.com/2015/05/15/is-it-possible-to-break-free-from-porn/
https://learn.covenanteyes.com/porn-free-challenge/?_ga=2.247678599.1223529159.1500298111-426510691.1473434320
https://www.covenanteyes.com/2017/02/21/how-do-i-find-my-accountability-partners/
I am 13 years old, about to turn 14. I can go 4 days without porn. On the fourth day, everything around me seem to turn sexual. I need help. I pray and I know that God is reaching out to me, but I just cant stop. I tried No Nut November but failed on the 6 day. I am so weak by myself, and sometimes I feel like God turned on me because I keep dropping my pants. I can’t tell anyone cause I feel like the blame will go to my parents, but its not their fault. Does anyone have tips on how to avoid going on to porn sites?
I think porn is good for health that keep your sperms activated and get your feelings out. I myself watch porn’s but in limitations
God doesn’t care about porn. God doesn’t care about masturbation. Are you so far below the wisdom of God to miss this? God doesn’t care about yoir porn desire. God could care less about you looking at a tree or looking at a rock or looking st a naked woman. God doesn’t care about it. Only feminists and women who complain about what porn looks like them, care.
Hi Jake,
I am curious to know what makes you say that? If watching pornography is a sin, and God cares very much about sin, why would God not care about one’s porn desire?
Moriah
Jake, I’m sure the devil would agree with you 100%. In all reality, scripture tells us what God thinks about impurity, sexual immorality in any form. “ For this is the will of God your sanctification that you abstain from sexual immorality, that each one of you know how to control his body with holiness and honor, not in the passion of lust like heathen who do not know God. Let no man transgress and wrong his brother or sister in this matter, for the Lord is an avenger in all of these things as we forwarded you, for you have not been called to impurity, but to sanctification. Therefore, whoever disregards this disregards not man but God who gives his Holy Spirit to you.” ( 1 Thessalonians 4:3-8).
Can you guys pray for me please? Im a 16y/o boy from PH, my name is Jireh and im addicted to porn and at the same time i do masturbation, and i really really dont like this, i want to end this, i want to live in purity and holiness, i want to please God not myself, and i ask for your prayers, Give me some advices and all other stuffs, may Godbless us all in our fight against All kinds of Sins.
Jireh,
Thank you for reaching out and asking for help. I am so glad to hear that you desire to live in purity in holiness. Acknowledging your need for recovery is one of the first steps in this process of healing!
If you are not using Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability, I would highly recommend that you download it onto your devices (phone, laptop, tablet, etc.). I also strongly encourage you to find a friend, relative, church leader, or any person you trust who can hold you accountable in this journey towards recovery. With God, anything is possible! You can end this addiction!
Praying for you, friend.
Moriah
Hey, just sort of decided to write in, instead of just passively reading some these sinful struggles that most of these people here are facing. I guess it really is human nature that facilitates these explicit sins to be committed repeatedly. Yes, as a Christian, it is right to feel remorseful and wanting to repent of this particular transgression against God. It does feel as though that this is probably the strongest clutch of the many apparent strongholds that seem to bound people in these acts of shame, guilt of iniquities present. I hope that may the Lord our God grant us a clean and contrite heart at last…
We make love once or twice a month but my watching of porn never stops. With the access of high speed Internet this porn watching and resulting in masturbation is my routine since long I mean very long it’s been over 25 years. After each episode I bow down to my Lord ask for forgiveness feels sorry for my sins but the circle repeats itself after every 72 hours without fail.
Ravi,
Thank you for sharing your struggles. Have you considered installing Covenant Eyes? Our software will actually monitor your online and offline activity and hold you accountable to what you are viewing online. Do you have a person that you can trust to help hold you accountable as well?
Blessings,
Moriah
I’m a 30 year old Christian women who is addicted to porn. I watch it once a day and after I feel so bad. I gone months without watching in the past but I fell again. It’s a sin and there’s no way to justify it. I’m ashamed of myself. I’m finding myself watching worse and worse types of porn. I been looking at porn since I was 4 years old and than at 13 I started to watch it on dvds I would steal from my father and than I watched it the computer when we got one in the house. I been in this addiction for 30 years. I hate myself. I hate that I don’t say no. I hate that I can’t say no. I hate myself for believing the devils lie that it wont harm anyone. It’s harms Jesus because he nailed that sin to the cross: I’m ashamed of myself and I feel dirty and unworthy to be in Gods presence. Please pray for me.
Hey Alice,
Your suffering just breaks my heart. I’m so concerned to hear you say that you’ve been looking at porn since you were 4. No child is porn-seeking at age 4. The only way you would have access to porn at that age is if an adult gave it to you, and if an adult gives pornography to a child, that is included in the definition of child abuse.
I would really like for you to find a therapist who can help you with this as childhood trauma. You’ll be looking for someone who is professionally licensed, and includes “trauma informed therapy” and optimally “EMDR certification” in their list of qualifications. I truly do think that if you approach this as childhood trauma, you will find relief from the overwhelming nature of this difficulty.
You are absolutely worthy. You are precious, whole, beloved, and safe as the most precious child could ever be. I hope you will find hope and healing.
Peace to you,
Kay
Hi Alice. First of all, you’re not alone. I’ve been severely sexually abused since around four years old as well. Pornography was basically shoved down my throat at a very early age by a parent and her boyfriends. I am now 61 years old and have been struggling with porn and masturbation for around 50 years. God is a God of mercy, he knows our struggles. When it no longer becomes a struggle, rather an enjoyment, that’s the problem begins. Scripture says in ( 1 John 3:3) “ for those who have hope in him makes themselves pure as he is pure.” Alice, notice the word “makes” it does not say “is.” So to become pure it takes work and lots of it. Alice, never give in to despair, fight the good fight even though porn may kick your butt now and then. ( Romans 12:22 tells us; “ Rejoice in hope, endure in suffering and persevere in prayer.” And remember, Jesus chose the apostle Paul for a mission, but what does the apostle Paul say of himself? “ I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate…for I do not do the good I want, but the evil I do not want is what I do.” ( Romans 7:15-25). So you see Alice, you’re not alone. It’s a daily battle, don’t give up, fight the good fight…you can do it sweetheart!! God bless you and please pray for me as well.
Its worse than any cocaine there is.
Masturbation usually comes along with pornography. I discovered how to masturbate when i was 9 years old. It was like a new secret game to me and i did it nearly everyday not knowing what it actually was.
A few years went on and i had discovered porn stories, pictures and videos with my first mobile phone. These encouraged my masturbation and i became more addicted to it. Very few days could go without masturbating.
At the age of 15, i found out that what i was addicted to was called masturbation and that it was a sin. I didnt know all these years and it was taking over me.
I tried many times than i can remember to break away from it but sooner or later, i still came back to masturbating. It still happened whether thee was porn or not.
I have prayed to God to help me with this addiction but i am still tied to it. I have been trying hard to get rid of it but with no avail.
I am 18 years old, still a virgin that is being weakened by this sin but i will keep on fighting.
Lord please come to my aid.
Please I need prayer help, I promise myself to stop watching porn but am still can’t stop it.😭 since 2015 till now
Friend,
I am praying for you, and I would encourage you to share your struggle with a trusted friend and ask them to pray for you as well! An ally is an incredible part of overcoming pornography addiction.
Blessings!
Moriah
I’m no longer guiltless about it, or ignorant about it being sinful for a reason (you turn another person into an object to be traded,used,discarded at minimum) and it devolves into worse things in the world and alone in it.
Doesn’t do the trick though to make me stop. I can at best muster 3-4 days before nature, or my nature,whichever has me back at it.
I mean I’ve tried every mental justification possible to loophole it to not feel bad about it as I once didn’t, like maybe if it’s a fictional character/ 3d model/cartoon. The chastisement is there and not going anywhere, and that’s for the best.
Something I’m in, not proud of, but it’s got a very strong button to press. I hope I’m not fighting this at age 70 or anything. Does it NEVER tire? That fire of lust never burn out? Seems to only do it when you give into it, let it have you for a bit, and then like embers it restarts.
The crazy thing is, in real life, I control myself perfectly fine. I’ve turned down offers for little bits of fun from very appealing women, just enraging/hurting their feelings. I’m able to say sure, you’re pretty, but not worth the headache/consequence/guilt of it. I don’t want to be sleeping and waking up next to a stranger, I don’t like that feeling,worrying if you are as healthy that way as you are pretty. No thanks. Not worth it.
Come fantasy, porn,etc.. no such strength exists in me.
Please I urgently need your prayers please, I have been battling with porn addiction for over about 10yers now, everytime I try to overcome something will come up, please I need your prayers and will God ever going to forgive me for this
Dauda,
I am praying for you! Please find peace knowing that you are not alone. Overcoming porn is not easy, and it must be met with perseverance. So, keep fighting, and keep praying! Romans 5:20-21 says, “But where sin increased, grace increased all the more, so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.”
Blessings,
Moriah
Thank you so much for this article. I have been struggling with this for as long as I can remember from junior school, over 10yrs. Been in this platform to read alot of articles on how to deal with addiction.
I have also thought of telling someone about it. But each time I try to, I’m scared and don’t know how to say it Because the only person I’m more closer to is my Pastor. He is my friend and we have a good relationship when it comes to ministry and family.
I don’t know how to tell him. I’ve prayed to God to help me get over this. I really want to quit in other to focus on what God has called me to. This would be my greatest miracle and I will tell the world my story someday when I’ve survived this pain I’m going through. Please pray for me.
Thanks
David,
I am praying for you! You are not alone. Telling anyone about your struggles can be very intimidating. Pray and ask God to give you the strength and peace to talk to your Pastor about this. Once you are able to, I think you will find that there is a huge weight lifted off your shoulders.
Blessings,
Moriah
“ For a man becomes a slave to whatever becomes his master.” ( 2Peter 2:19). Putting the blame on a smart phone or a computer for our porn pastime is about like putting the blame on guns for killing people. Guns don’t kill people, people kill people. I’ve had a gun in my drawer for 20 years and that gun hasn’t killed anyone. In ( 1 Corinthians 9:27) the Apostle Paul says of himself;” For I discipline my body and subdue it in fear of preaching to others I too will be cut off.” Notice he did not say, I discipline my body and at times give in to it. Do you want to be set free from porn? Just say no!! Or at least, that’s what Jesus expects us to do. He tells us; “ Let your yes mean yes and your no mean no, anything in between is from the evil one.” ( Matthew 5:37). Life is short, and Jesus tells us that Hell is real and last for an eternity. Ask yourself, how do you want to be remembered. A good good holy person? A good father, mother, husband, wife, son or daughter? Or the person that fooled everyone? The person locked in the bathroom or hiding in the basement that just died of a massive heart attack with porn images on their smartphone or computer, with their private in their hand. Jesus tells us in Luke12:2-3; “ Nothing is covered up that will not be revealed, or hidden that will not be known…what is hidden in secret will be proclaimed from the rooftops.” Something to think about the next time we click on porn.
I need the strength from God to overcome this addiction please pray for me.
Hi friend,
I am praying for you! Please be encouraged by James 1:2-3, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.”
Keep fighting, and keep turning to God for strength!
Blessings,
Moriah
I have read lot of comments from people which is quite Encouraging.
I fall under the Categories of Porn and Masturbation, I have prayed and fasted several times, shared my problem with people but still it is all unproductive and futile.
I don’t view porn often but when I do and already satisfied, the bitterness will be greater than the first urge and I will become depressed.
It’s really difficult to stop. People says “it doesn’t take a day to stop”, then I do use that Phrase to do it another day which really piss me off often.
I need prayers.
Hi Timilehin,
I am glad to hear that you have found encouragement from others who are commenting! Although porn addiction is a difficult struggle to overcome, it can be very assuring and motivating to know that you aren’t alone in this struggle!
I want to encourage you to keep pressing on in the fight to quit. No human is exempt from temptation, and porn is very tempting. Do you have a trusted friend or mentor whom you can talk to and ask for accountability? I have found that when struggling in sin, I am much more equipped to overcome it if I am accountable to another believer.
Above all, be fervent in prayer and in Scripture. God is our strength!
Blessings,
Moriah
I would like to take this all in a step further, I am suspecting a common lie, this lie is that people blend in our scientific nature as a way to naturalize and defuse the intensity of this problem of porn addiction. This is what you practically see when reading the bible. When certain tribes of Israel get lost in there covenant with God, they began making exceptions to there rule and things become more permissible, prostitution is fine, the worship of other gods is fine, homosexuality is fine, taking the lord’s commandment in vain and allowing people to do what’s fine in there eyes have been a consistent problem among the Israelites. Cookie cutter allegiance to God devises and they are destroyed. God is not someone you can manipulate and put into what you think is true. In regards to the sin of lust I would say this, its about the freedom from not doing it, not how much I can get away with, with a very forgiving God. Geeze please give me a break. A false church miles away from where I can see it.
Help ME O GOD of mercy. I hate myself when i come to think of this, ‘refussing to engage in physical sex at the age of 22 but rather defiled my inner man with porn’ i need your encouragement more and more as you help me in prayers to get rid of this filthy habit. LORD, HAVE MERCY ON ME.
Well here i am. I suppose i will find a bit of rest for my soul if i tell my story. So all i can remember is that i was about 13-14 when i discovered masturbation. And ooh i was hooked on it … was doing it 3-4-5 times a day. I was masturbating like crazy , day by day , year by year. After this 4 years have passed and i was still hooked on masturbation. Then at about 18 years old i got a job in an internet cafe , i didn’t know about porn then but all of this was to become history when by accident i accessed a porn site. I say by accident because personally i think that this was a trap placed by satan to hook me for good. All i remember is that i was looking for an antivirus for my pc, and instead of an antivirus program , porn popped up. And i was hooked on it. I was watching porn 24/7 , 365 days a year. I was eating , breathing porn.
Fast forward 2004 , i meat a group of christians who are my friends and the church i go to now. I talked with my pastor and he said that God will help me , i just need to quit watching porn which obviously didn’t work. And i was getting the “you are going to hell” , well i know whats going on , giving a scare to a person that has a porn addiction or whatever addiction believe me it wont work. Then i took out my internet with great hopes that i will finally be over , that i will be free. But that also failed. I stopped masturbating for about 1-2 weeks , then it came back in more , how should i put this ? more interesting ways. I was “looking” for porn. I mean i would do anything and would look anywhere just to get it. Porn magazines , movies , you name it.
Then , not having results , i said :God i need help , and he sent me a very , very good friend , who i can talk with about this.
Talking about the matter didn’t fix it but at least i had somebody who understands what i am going through.
Then i started reading all kinds of books about addictions and how to stop them … all of them failed.
Only God himself knows the amount of times i prayed , cried and fought this. It’s been more then 21 years since this started and i had enough of this.
Many people said : Get married
How can i get married if i am hooked on porn ? What kind of marriage would that be ? Lusting to other women and not loving your own wife.
2020….
It’s still the same thing , i cant quit whatever i do. I put back my internet , because taking out the internet WONT help , i tried it and it failed miserabley.
So what now ?
I personally think i am under a curse/wichcraft or something like that. I cannot find a logical explanation to what has been going on to me.
Prayer , no Fasting , nothing worked.
I know God loves me , i think this addiction might be for a reason , not sure what reason is that but i had enough of this.
I need help and i don’t know what to do anymore. It’s been a hard battle and i am ready to give up.
Mind you , maybe you will have fun reading this , but believe me , it was not fun at all. Maybe just pain and tears because you cannot quit and if anybody find out about it , your life will be ruined.
Hey ! Believe me. I’ve been in the same boat for long.
But I through Jesus overcame it in somewhat like an instant.
*Truly prayer helps. Please read below comment too.
The above statement would have sounded unreal to me if I heard it when I was under addiction.
But It(Satan) got out of me. And its real.
Please trust me and The words I speak here.
I never had urge to watch porn since 2019 Nov. I realised that its gone. Not just for a moment but completely.
It was still so surprising to me that how it all went off. All that struggle I had to stop that urge. It was all gone suddenly at end of year 2019.
Let me recall what I have done.
( I could relate to most[all] of all that you have said )
After a long battle of failures of putting trust on my own will power to overcome urge. While I hooked myself in cycle of (Lust – Prayer)..(lot happened)…. I don’t know how I had this thought. I believe it was from God obviously.
The thought(idea) was whenever some entity(Not me) urge tries to make me do it. I remember saying…
As entity makes me to open porn and watch it.
**I said What is this that I am watching. It’s disgusting. How could someone watch it? ** I close my phone. And pray by just kneeling in secret to God.
I think I did that twice??…maybe i don’t remember.
This was really true.::::
That night I had a dream , “”where Satan masturbating in my house. And I truly disgusted it. Then I said *In jesus name* get out. Then Satan had no power. He flew off.”” Dream ended.
From that morning I haven’t had any urge at all. I could feel peace that I haven’t felt before.
Bobby, believe me when I say I know exactly how you feel. I discovered masturbation when I was 20…I’m 23 now and believe me, this is an extremely difficult battle to win because the decision to either go for it or not is in your mind.
I didn’t even like porn at first cuz for me it was very disgusting. And believe me, I was so innocent that even at age 20, I didn’t even know there was something like masturbation. The time I got to grasp the whole idea was when some dude was talking about it in a bus. But there was this girl I really really wanted to do things (lustful things) with and I didn’t know how. For one, I was a complete loser and though I knew that girls liked me and wanted me to approach them, I had zero confidence to do so…so I always ended up being not so close with them. But with this particular girl, I didn’t mind shooting my shot even though it meant me taking a step I never wanted to take. I told her how I felt about her and believe it or not, she rejected me like I was some piece of trash and even told her friends and my friends how she did that.
Believe me, I couldn’t live with myself. For the first time I tried stepping out of my comfort zone this is what I get? So now after finding out there was something like masturbation, where you could literally get what you want in your mind plus the physical sensation as well, damn…I really got a piece of it each and every day for months. After finding out it’s even better with pornography, I even went deeper in this disgusting act. I even forgot about her and fantasized about the different women on my screen. For 2 years, I couldn’t stop.
Fast forward, 3 months ago, I realized something. Even though I had prayed, fasted and read the Word countless times during those years of bondage, I realized my will is weak and that’s why I kept on surrendering. And I had confidence in myself that I thought I could handle it even though I was praying and fasting. Then I read some scriptures that completely changed my perception about dealing with this. Then I also read Psalm 23, a popular scripture, again. There’s a part that says, “Thy rod and Thy staff they comfort me…”
That’s when God told me that the reason why I keep sinning is because His Word is not authoritative enough in my life. His staff draws me closer to Him and let me know that His grace is sufficient enough to come back to Him when I go the wrong way. But then also, His rod corrects and rebukes me of my actions and makes me turn away from masturbation in disgust. Therefore if I really want to beat this, I need to completely surrender to Him.
The devil will never attack your spirit because it’s already saved. He’ll attack where your most vulnerable, your mind. In that case, he’ll have two for one because when you make that decision to bow to him in your mind, your body and your soul will have no other option than to follow along. If you do not take caution, a time will come where even your spirit will have to bow, making it three for one.
Bro, if you really want to be free, I want to let you know that you have a will and if you decide to never give in, you’ll fight it and when your strength fails at a point, believe me, God will give you strength to fight it and be COMPLETELY free from it because you were faithful to Him. It’s been 3 months now and I’ve never ever even had the urge to go back to it. You can do it brother, I believe in you and most importantly, your Father who is in heaven does.
It’s been so hard for me so far trying to quite porn please I need help I don’ know what to do anymore I have tried a lot but nothing seems to be working out with me I need help I want to quite
Hi Alex,
Quitting porn is SO difficult. You are not alone in this battle. For those who are trying but struggling, I recommend three steps:
1. Share your struggles with a friend, church leader, or mentor. Ask them to pray for you and walk alongside you (and hold you accountable!).
2. Use Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability. It is an incredible tool that will hold you accountable for everything you do online.
3. Immerse yourself in Scripture and prayer. In some of my darkest moments in life, I have found that Christ is my supreme source of joy, hope, and forgiveness.
Keep fighting! You are strong, and you are worth it!
Blessings,
Moriah
I admit – ashamedly – to watching porn occasionally. By that I mean – honestly – no more than an hour per week – because I’m too busy with work and other stuff. I don’t enjoy watching it, but as a man to whom no woman could ever be sexually attracted, there is no point in trying to find a woman to have a genuine relationship with. She doesn’t exist, so it will never happen. I’m 43 and haven’t been hugged – even once – in 12 years – and I have never been on a date, never had sex and never kissed a woman. I work out 3-4x per week, take care of myself and climb waterfalls as a hobby. I have a great well-paying job in a respected profession and own several properties debt-free. I mention these things in case someone thinks I’m some slob living in my parents’ basement. Nope. Whatever other guys have that attracts women to them sexually I do not have. The sensations I feel watching porn are entirely artificial but they are the closest I will ever be to experiencing actual intimacy myself because no woman could ever want me for me because I am fundamentally unattractive.
I’ve been in the game for 8 years now (quitting porn). My longest clean streak without it was 2.5 years.
When it comes down to it, you have to have a good reason to quit and remind yourself of it every day. This is a game of will power, nothing else. Removing a computer, blocking sites, etc. will not work at all. You will eventually cave in and go back. You need to find the strength within you.
I feel ashamed and recognize its a filthy sinful habit. I feel so disappointed in myself that I have let God down. I am married and have struggled with lust for as long as I can remember and grave porn like a drug addict. I watch it while masturbating or shortly thereafter and feel filthy afterwards but I keep going back and back…hardest thing in the world to quit.
Nevertheless, I love Jesus so much and it hurts me to know that I hurt our relationship when I engage in sin because I hate being separated from him. God..I am your child. Forgive me for my habitual sin and I thank Jesus daily for saving me.
Hi Dan,
Praise God for your faith and your commitment to pressing on in the fight! I’m reminded of 2 Corinthians 5:18, “Everything is from God, who has reconciled us to himself through Christ.” If you haven’t already, you might want to check out Overcome Porn: The 40 Day Challenge. God bless you!
In Christ,
Keith
If the Bible says that grieving the Holy Spirit is an unforgivable sin, and watching porn leads us to grieve the Holy Spirit, how do I fix this? Or is there no way and no hope?
Hi Jonathan,
I know it’s hard, but there’s definitely a way and definitely hope! We believe it’s VERY possible to quit porn with the right resources and that’s why we’re here. We care about you and want to equip you with tools to overcome porn and encourage your relationship with God. I’d like you to check out this post for tips on how to get started.
Your question about grieving the Holy Spirit is a tough one, but I believe there is grace and forgiveness for those struggling with porn. 1 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” I’ve seen first hand God’s faithfulness and righteousness to forgive and restore those who have been trapped in a life of watching porn!
Blessings,
Keith
i need help to quit porn,i tried many times and all failed
Hi Andy,
I’m glad you’re reaching out! We’re here to help. Have you tried the six steps given here by recovery expert, Dr. Doug Weiss? This is a great place to start. If you still feel like you’re spinning your wheels, you may want to consider getting professional help. Keep up the fight and don’t lose heart!
Keith
hello I need help
I don’t want to watch it but I can’t
i keep praying but i just can’t stop
please pray for me
Hi friend,
We are praying for you! Quitting porn is not easy, but it is possible! Do you have a friend, mentor, or church leader who you can ask to help you with this? They can pray for you and help you say no to porn when you are feeling tempted. They can also be your ally in using Covenant Eyes Screen Accountability!
Keep praying! God is working in you, and he can change you!
Blessings,
Moriah
help me
I can’t stop it
I am just 11 years old
it is just to much for me
Ano,
I am praying for you! God is greater than your porn addiction, and through him, you can be free! Keep fighting, and reach out to a friend for prayer and wisdom, if you can.
Blessings,
Moriah
Hello, I have a porn addiction problem since I was a kid. I had pray, cried, even read the Bible more often, and after months I fall in the same sin and hate myself for that. There are times I go out and share the gospel, then I stop because I feel ashamed, guilt, embarrassed for who I am or become. How could I share or spread the good word when I can’t even live a holiness life. Need help, need prayers
Hi Frederick,
God bless you for reaching out to us! Do you have an accountability partner you can talk to about your struggles? One of the ways God equips people to deal with temptation is through accountability. Here’s an article that gives 6 steps you’ll need to take in order to quit.
Keep fighting!
Keith
But thanks be to God that, though you once were slaves to sin, you wholeheartedly obeyed the form of teaching to which you were committed. You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness. I am speaking in human terms because of the weakness of your flesh. Just as you used to offer the parts of your body in slavery to impurity and to escalating wickedness, so now offer them in slavery to righteousness leading to holiness For when you were slaves to sin, you were free of obligation to righteousness. What fruit did you reap at that time from the things of which you are now ashamed? The outcome of those things is death. But now that you have been set free from sin and have become slaves to God, the fruit you reap leads to holiness, and the outcome is eternal life Romans 6:19-22
hmmm even if I try after some time I will now do it again pls pray for me
I have a problem. And desperately need someone’s help, but no one to turn to.
Hi Kev, thanks for reaching out. One of the most important things in overcoming porn is finding people to talk to that you can trust. Finding someone can be hard, but it’s worth the effort! I encourage you to start with the people you know—think through your current acquaintances, family members, the church you attend, your friends. Is there anyone you can talk to? It might be hard to think about having this discussion, but talking to a trustworthy friend is SO IMPORTANT. If you can’t find someone, I recommend checking out the Samson Society. It’s an accountability group for men and they have online meetings.
It can seem hard to find people if this is the first time you’ve reached out for help, but you are not alone! There are many people out there who share your desires and want to help.
Blessings,
Keith