Help Others Restore Integrity jared wilson
Help Others Restore Integrity 2 minute read

Why I’m Still Accountable After Quitting Porn: Jared Wilson’s Story

Last Updated: September 8, 2021

When I downloaded and installed accountability software for my web surfing, I was several years removed from my interest in pornography. I used to have a serious problem—the rotten fruit from a seed planted by a kid’s dad’s adult magazine brought on the 5th grade school bus, grown in the fertile manure of my flesh. Roughly twenty years later, God worked a miracle in my life—I would not have repented otherwise—and my taste for porn was subsumed by the sweetness of Christ and his gospel.

But one of the things I learned even as I was growing by leaps and bounds in Christ is that my heart is deceitful above all things (Jeremiah 17:9). I had become intimately familiar with what I was capable of. So it made total sense to install a layer of accountability in this way, not to keep me from looking at pornography but to provide reminders and assurances to myself and others. Here are three reasons I use Internet accountability software:

1. It takes away the solitude of surfing.

Sin thrives in the dark. For most of us, Internet use is a solitary endeavor. Even when we are in a room with other people, the screens of our computers and mobile devices have a way of sequestering us mentally and emotionally, interrupting our attention to and interaction with others. But the Christian life is designed to be lived in community. So using accountability software provides another set of eyes on my online activity. I would not be able to say “Nobody would know.” All of the time I spend on the web is no longer private time, even if I’m surfing all by myself.

2. It prevents morally lazy browsing.

Oh, I still surf lazily, perusing my friends’ silly Facebook updates and taking in quirky news items and updates on Bigfoot sightings online. But since I know a record of every questionable site I visit will be sent to my designated accountability partner, I am more at attention about sites that offer sexual titillation, even if not outright explicit content, knowing that all the devil needs is a foothold (Ephesians 4:27). This includes websites featuring both sports and entertainment news, two areas I am interested in, as well some notorious news sites which know that sex sells. None of us can pursue purity on autopilot. Accountability software helps me stay mindful (2 Corinthians 10:5) and intentional about my time online.

3. It gives those who love me confidence in me.

When I first began using accountability software I designated fellow church leaders as recipients of my updates. I wanted them to be confident in their pastor and friend’s online habits.

Accountability software doesn’t cure interest in pornography, especially since there are so many delivery methods for the drug, but it was just one more way to help build their confidence in my leadership, not to mention of course to have them hold me accountable.

I have since added my wife to my accountability list. She now receives a list of every questionable website I’ve visited on a weekly basis. I didn’t add her because she didn’t trust me. I added her because I wanted to continue showing her that her trust is not ill-founded. It is a way of loving my wife, showing her transparency in this way and helping her confidence grow in my leadership of our family.


Jared Wilson is the pastor of Middletown Springs Community Church in Middletown Springs, Vermont, and the author of the books Your Jesus is Too Safe: Outgrowing a Drive-Thru, Feel-Good Savior and Gospel Wakefulness. He is also the author of the LifeWay Bible study resources Abide and Seven Daily Sins. Jared has written for Rev! Magazine, Tabletalk, Exponential’s Leadership Learnings, Pulpit Helps Magazine, Disciple Magazine, Collegiate, and numerous other publications. Jared blogs for The Gospel Coalition and The Thinklings.

Comments on: Why I’m Still Accountable After Quitting Porn: Jared Wilson’s Story

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Related in Help Others Restore Integrity

Editor's Picks

The front of a historic Catholic church against a blue sky.

Help Others Restore Integrity

5 Steps to Implement Safe Haven Sunday in Your Parish

Regardless of the size of a parish, the role of the parish…

6 minute read

Read Post

Editor's Picks

A woman sharing about church resources with a group.

Help Others Restore Integrity

5 Resources Your Parish Needs to Be Sharing to Equip Marriages and Families

Addressing pornography in your parish can be a full-time job, and maybe…

6 minute read

Read Post

Editor's Picks

A priest giving a homily at his church.

Help Others Restore Integrity

Revitalizing Diocesan and Parish Ministry With Safe Haven Sunday

Addressing hard topics is key to fruitful diocesan and parish ministry. After…

7 minute read

Read Post

Editor's Picks

Two male accountability partners encouraging one another.

Help Others Restore Integrity

3 Keys To Making Accountability Work

Covenant Eyes serves many churches, missionary organizations, and other groups, and using…

7 minute read

Read Post

Editor's Picks

A pastor preparing for a sermon with a Bible and study tools.

Help Others Restore Integrity

Plan for Success in the Battle Against Pornography!

At Covenant Eyes, we talk with pastors every week as they come…

2 minute read

Read Post

Editor's Picks

Black and white image of a worship service in a church.

Help Others Restore Integrity

3 Ways Your Church Might be Paying “The Porn Tax”

Have you been to a struggling church before? You know—a group of…

3 minute read

Read Post

Related in Help Others Restore Integrity

The front of a historic Catholic church against a blue sky.

Help Others Restore Integrity

5 Steps to Implement Safe Haven Sunday in Your Parish

Regardless of the size of a parish, the role of the parish…

Regardless of the size of a parish, the role of the parish priest and his leadership team is essentially the same: the salvation of souls. This is the sole reason for the Incarnation, Passion, Death,…

6 minute read

0 comments

A woman sharing about church resources with a group.

Help Others Restore Integrity

5 Resources Your Parish Needs to Be Sharing to Equip Marriages and Families

Addressing pornography in your parish can be a full-time job, and maybe…

Addressing pornography in your parish can be a full-time job, and maybe you have a coordinator who does in fact have it as his or her job description. Whether or not that role exists in…

6 minute read

0 comments

A priest giving a homily at his church.

Help Others Restore Integrity

Revitalizing Diocesan and Parish Ministry With Safe Haven Sunday

Addressing hard topics is key to fruitful diocesan and parish ministry. After…

Addressing hard topics is key to fruitful diocesan and parish ministry. After the Gospel reading, I sat down in my pew and asked the Holy Spirit to open me up to what the priest was…

7 minute read

0 comments

Two male accountability partners encouraging one another.

Help Others Restore Integrity

3 Keys To Making Accountability Work

Covenant Eyes serves many churches, missionary organizations, and other groups, and using…

Covenant Eyes serves many churches, missionary organizations, and other groups, and using accountability software on all devices can be very beneficial—but only when individuals are encouraged to have safe and personal friends or mentors receive…

7 minute read

0 comments

A pastor preparing for a sermon with a Bible and study tools.

Help Others Restore Integrity

Plan for Success in the Battle Against Pornography!

At Covenant Eyes, we talk with pastors every week as they come…

At Covenant Eyes, we talk with pastors every week as they come to us looking for resources, solutions, or just plain, “what can I do next” questions.  Most are reacting to a current cry for…

2 minute read

0 comments

Black and white image of a worship service in a church.

Help Others Restore Integrity

3 Ways Your Church Might be Paying “The Porn Tax”

Have you been to a struggling church before? You know—a group of…

Have you been to a struggling church before? You know—a group of people who show up more or less every Sunday morning, but it’s like pulling teeth to get anyone committed beyond that? Or maybe…

3 minute read

2 comments