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Torn Apart by Porn – A Story of a Marriage Overturned by Pornography

Last Updated: April 22, 2015

Luke Gilkerson

Luke Gilkerson has a BA in Philosophy and Religious Studies and an MA in Religion. He is the author of Coming Clean: Overcoming Lust Through Biblical Accountability and The Talk: 7 Lessons to Introduce Your Child to Biblical Sexuality. Luke and his wife Trisha blog at IntoxicatedOnLife.com

Diony George is a native Alaskan, a full-time wife and a mother of seven. Her deep faith in God and desire to help others led her to share her compelling and moving story. She says,

“My main reason for writing the book is to help someone else not go through what I did. Torn Apart was hard to write . . . it’s very personal, it’s very emotional. But I believe: if pornography isn’t brought out in the light . . . how are people going to realize how serious it is and how it is affecting lives?

“I’m very committed to the principal of marriage, and I was to my own. Unfortunately because of what porn eventually did to my husband and our family, I couldn’t stay married to him. That was a hugely difficult decision for me; there were days I could only deal with one hour at a time because the pain was so intense. What got me through was my faith in God, and the support of family and friends. Through His love I found hope and healing, and I believe the same can come true for others facing similar trials.

“Joy can be found again. You can still have a good life. You have to get through the bad stuff and not give up. Forgiving those who hurt you brings peace that cannot be found any other way.”

Torn Apart is about a woman named Alyson who loved her husband Jared. His magnetic personality attracted her from the first time they met and continued when they married. She believed it was the beginning of a wonderful life. She had no idea he was keeping dark secrets—no idea he was addicted to porn. One fateful night, everything they’d built starts to rapidly unravel and Alyson begins a painful but determined search for the truth.

. . . She reached across the seat and picked up the envelope, trying to ignore her rapidly increasing heart rate. The very instant the paper made contact with her skin, a horrible sick feeling charged through her body, followed immediately by a clear and precise thought.

You can choose to open this envelope, which will start a chain of events that will change your life irreversibly, or you can set it back on the seat and continue with how things are.

What could possibly be inside? Whatever it was she now knew for certain it was going to affect her more than she had imagined. Hesitations assaulted her brain as she tried to weigh both choices and her body literally began to shake as old memories and experiences rewound at top speed. Did she have enough courage to logically face the facts about her life with her husband?

In recent months she experienced nagging doubts and fleeting impressions Jared was distancing himself emotionally from her and it was bringing up old fears. The past held something she couldn’t bear to think about, something she kept securely locked, bolted and sealed, with a red flashing light, behind a door in her mind.

Years before Jared had wounded her deeply and their marriage had barely survived, he had promised nothing like it would ever happen again. He told her repeatedly how sorry he was and that he had made a huge mistake. If he dared to re-open that door and force her to walk through it, and feel that kind of pain again, she thought she would die.

No, that’s ridiculous . . . it has to be something else. Remember what we’ve shared since then? Renewed love, a lot more laughter, and happy times with our boys—that was real. You know Jared loves you. No. It can’t be that, it just can’t.

So why did the horribly sick feeling charging through her body feel so familiar?

“I know many people who battle the problem Torn Apart discusses every day—pornography. Diony has done an amazing job of conveying her personal battle with a husband addicted to porn in this new book, Torn Apart. The frightening capacity of porn to destroy our families from the inside out needs to be addressed and this book has done it in a very convincing and, yet readable, even entertaining, way.” (Richard Paul Evans, NY bestselling author of the Christmas Box.)

“An amazing story of courage and strength.” (K.B reader from Alaska)

Torn Apart is a story of one very young woman’s strength, growth, and love for her children, herself, her new relationship and God. It is also a teaching guide for the innocent about how an addiction to pornography can ruin a marriage from the inside out. It is an important lesson for our emotional times.” (Excerpt from the review of Carine Nadel.)

“Pornography is a societal plague that destroys the individual, the marriage unit and the family. When the family is fractured, a society is weakened. This book, based on a true story about pornography addiction and finding hope, is a call for openness.” (Anchorage Daily News, Reading the North, Sept 6, 2008)

To purchase a copy of Diony’s book go to her website.

  • Comments on: Torn Apart by Porn – A Story of a Marriage Overturned by Pornography
    1. Tracy on

      I am writing to you in tears. I have been dealing with my husbands porn addition for 5 yrs. He has made promise after promise and hasnt yet kept them. I love him very much, we have 5 children all together and i really dont want this to end. I have suffered termendously, having thoughts and feelings that I dont understand completly. I have done every thing in my power to stop this addition. I have even tryed to fulfill all of his fantasies. I do beleive that he is so addictaed that he is willing to let our marriage go. I cant say anything anymore for that fear. I have reasently have just asked him to let me know I would rather watch them with him just so that he wouldnt have to lie to me anymore. Well that didnt work and I think it is getting worse,like every day. Please I cant afford your book, but I really need some advise I have no one to turn to. I just dont know how long I can do this mentally.

      Reply
    2. Luke Gilkerson on

      Tracy,

      Thanks for stopping by. If you are looking to talk to someone about these issues I recommend going to Porn Addict Hubby. There is a forum there where women in a similar situation talk to one another for advice and encouragement. I also recommend going to my post, “Husbands Who Watch Porn – When They Don’t Want to Change.” You’ll find a whole host of articles and links that may be helpful. I pray for you and your husband, that you will both find a way to resolve the tension that you feel over this problem. God bless.

      Reply
    3. Anne on

      Tracy, I feel your pain so much. I have been living with my husband’s porn for 18 years and an STD to go along with that. I don’t even know who I am anymore, I live in a daze, sometimes the agony and pain is so overwhelming I think I am going to lose my mind. BUT I know it is God’s grace which carries me through each and every day. I could never make it without him. My husband makes me no promises and we have zero communication, he doesn’t even touch me anymore. I cannot recall the last time we were intimate. (I have lost all feelings for him anyway) We have 2 kids and I have tried leaving and they were so upset I went back. We have a business and some lega issues in court which makes it very difficult for me to leave. I am also so devasted because of the STD, I can never be involved with another person and expose them to that. The pain has been gut wrenching, my health is bad, I have headaches and my pressure is high. I recently ventured out and joined a support group for wives like us because I just could not take it anymore. It does help to talk to someone else, especially someone who has felt your pain. Try finding such a group in your area. Prayers also will give you the strength to cope everyday.

      Reply
    4. Diony on

      Tracy,

      I’m sorry about the pain pornography is causing you. I know it so well, that is why I had to share my story in a book. Please email me at dionygeorge@gmail.com. I want to help.

      Reply

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