I was blessed to be raised in a godly home with no access/exposure to pornography until I was about 14, and that exposure was a one-time, random viewing of an R-rated film on Pay-per-view. But that single sight triggered lustful desires that had been lying under the surface of my seemingly pure heart and mind. The images remain with me to this day.
A picture’s worth a thousand words–and ten thousand moments of temptation.
I struggled with “soft-porn” (if there is such a thing) off and on throughout high school and gradually moved to “the hard stuff” in college and beyond. I’d go for months at a time with daily temptation/failure, followed by months of freedom/victory.
As a college student and youth ministry leader at my local church at the time I fell into sexual sin with several girlfriends (who were also ministry leaders). I remained in these sinful relationships for long periods of time, causing some of the greatest emotional/spiritual pain I’ve ever experienced, as well as deeply hurting the women involved with me.
With the help of godly friendships/accountability, I have seen the Holy Spirit lead me into the desire for purity of mind, heart, and life. By God’s grace, after repenting of my promiscuity and dedicating myself to live in purity I abstained from fornication until my wedding day. I still struggle with temptation to lust but feel like I’m winning the battle against it, by the power of Christ in me. I hope to tell my story to other brothers in Christ and live my life as a testimony to the mercy, grace, and steadfast love of our awesome God.