Most Recent Posts in Rebuild Your Marriage
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4 Reasons Shame Cripples Spouses of Addicts (and How to Overcome It)
“My husband is the sex addict; why should I feel shame?” For…
“My husband is the sex addict; why should I feel shame?” For most healthy outsiders, the logical answer is, “You shouldn’t.” But for most spouses of sex addicts, the feeling of shame clings to us…
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Are You Attracted to Your Wife or Objectifying Her?
I Plan on Objectifying my Wife. You Can’t Stop Me! I recently…
I Plan on Objectifying my Wife. You Can’t Stop Me! I recently wrote a Covenant Eyes article “What Christian Culture Has Gotten Wrong About Sexual Purity.” In it, I wrote: Satan’s definition of sex is…
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Can Couples Therapy Fix Our Relationship?
I’ll never forget the day I walked out of therapy during early…
I’ll never forget the day I walked out of therapy during early recovery. I left our therapist’s office crying, screaming, and slamming the door, vowing never to return. It’s safe to assume I was not…
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3 Steps to Start Rebuilding Trust and Respect in Your Marriage
Marriages Need Trust and Respect Trust and respect are the concrete and…
Marriages Need Trust and Respect Trust and respect are the concrete and re-bar of a strong marital foundation. If one or the other is missing, the marriage structure is weakened and subject to damage. When…
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How Boundaries Helped Heal Our Marriage: Robin and Dave’s Story, Part 2
My wife Robin and I have been on a 15-year journey of…
My wife Robin and I have been on a 15-year journey of recovery from the damage caused by my addiction to pornography, strip clubs, and masturbation. The shame of my 20-year relationship with pornography during…
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Therapeutic Disclosure: How It Can Help Your Marriage Heal
What You Don’t Know Can Hurt You Imagine you go to the doctor…
What You Don’t Know Can Hurt You Imagine you go to the doctor and learn that you might have cancer. You are sent home and told to come back next week to find out. You don’t…
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How Respect Shrivels the Power of Porn
If you had tried to convince me 11 years ago that I needed…
If you had tried to convince me 11 years ago that I needed to respect my porn-addicted husband, I would have laughed in your face. Not the “funny ha-ha” kind of laugh. More like a sneer…
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When Fantasy Invades Your Marriage
Fantasy seems like an invincible foe. Close your eyes and you can…
Fantasy seems like an invincible foe. Close your eyes and you can picture anything you want, with no one to stop you. Unlimited helpings of dessert, without gaining any weight? Done. Scoring the winning touchdown…
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3 Ways Porn Shreds Marriages with a “Shame Bomb”
Some movies start with a serene setting, only to have the world…
Some movies start with a serene setting, only to have the world collapse around the main character in the first two minutes. A wife discovering porn is a lot like that. Life seems normal, almost…
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How Boundaries Helped Heal Our Marriage: Robin and Dave’s Story
Fifteen years ago, Dave called a dating line hoping to have a…
Fifteen years ago, Dave called a dating line hoping to have a sexual conversation with a woman. Even though he confessed it, he was unwilling to admit the seriousness of his offense. I asked him…