About the author, Chris McKenna

Chris is the Covenant Eyes Educational Resource Manager. Chris has a BA in Accountancy and Spanish from Western Michigan University. After 12 years in business advising with Ernst & Young, God led Chris to a full-time student ministry role. He started protectyoungeyes.com in 2015  as a ministry to equip and educate parents and teens on the latest gadgets, apps, and how to use the Internet well, which led him to Covenant Eyes. God works in unexpected ways!

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Porn and Your Husband

Parenting the Internet Generation Ebook Cover

Did you catch your husband watching porn? Learn the answers to common questions, tips to productive conversations, steps to setting boundaries, and how to determine the next steps for your marriage.

8 thoughts on “My Husband Has PIED: What Do I Do?

  1. My husband knows I’m aware of his porn use, yet he refuses to talk about it or admit that it’s an issue in our relationship. I’m not sure the extent of it I just know it’s not good and he suffers from PIED. Don’t know where to go with this.

  2. Being in our mid-sixties, and with my husband having indulged in porn, dating sites, etc., for a couple of decades, resulting in PIED, I don’t have a lot of hope that we will ever be able to have a satisfying sex life like we had prior to internet porn invading our lives. It’s been over 2 years since d-day and he is 11 months porn and inappropriate fantasy free, and he now says that he hates sex, and wants to puke when he thinks of it, because of the damage that it has done. So now he has gone from believing the lies that “porn isn’t so bad” and “nobody’s being hurt” to believing the lie that “sex is bad”, and I’m still being hurt!!! I reminded him that God created sex to be a blessing and it’s the perversion that he should hate. He is a retired pastor and has studied the Bible extensively and knows it’s truths, so why is he still believing lies??? I am at a loss as I doubt that he will even bother reading this blog, as he now prefers spending many hours on the net looking at cars, rv’s, cell phones, stocks, etc. (he calls these “hobbies”, but nothing is being accomplished), and refuses to do any kind of research on his own that would better our relationship. I believe he thinks that I will eventually just “get over it”, resulting in spending the rest of our lives together in a mediocre marriage. He tells me that I am the most important person in his life, but I believe that the internet is still his priority most of the time. When I tell him my needs for him to research ways to rebuild trust and our marriage, his come-back is “I’m trying!!!” God help us…… Thank you for providing space for me, and others, to vent. I pray that God will expand your ministry, and its influence will help many people be set free, and marriages saved.

  3. I am a 62 year old male who’s wife and marriage were destroyed because of my internet porn use that led to my having a one-time affair. I also had PIED and while I was watching an acting out to porn I was not able to perform with my wife. She was frustrated and I was frustrated neither one of us knew why. I didn’t understand until I got into recovery. I have not watched porn in 20 months but my marriage is over. I have my own recovery website now as I have been in recovery since January 2016 and all the research I have done leads me to believe that if I find another woman to share my life with that I am confident that I will be able to resume normal sexual relations. Healthy and centered in Christ.

    Any man who is actively watching porn and does not think it is affecting his life, his relationship with God or his relationship with his wife has his head anchored in cement. He is in denial or uneducated and needs help. If you are a wife and are not ready to give up on your husband or marriage yet there is help out there for you. You should at least find a registered sex therapist for counseling. Because of what I have done to my wife the fact that I still love her has led me to a very compassionate and caring Spirit towards other women who are dealing with this.

    Pornography is Satan’s number one tool that he is using to destroy marriages, families and the church in today’s society. It destroyed my marriage and broke up my family but it is not destroying my life. God has a purpose for my life.

    • Robert:

      You are so correct Abba Father has a purpose of all our life’s. I like you lost a wife of 35 years because of many factors. I have been clean for several years I have many accountablity guys around me. I learned that Covenant Eyes is the Most important thing to be able to give your Beloved. Now I just have to wait my time for Abba Father to bring the new Mrs. G. into my life so she will KNOW I only have eyes for her which for me means have the type of Covenant marriage Abba Father wants all of us to have. Be Blessed my brother stand strong Job 31:1-8 & Matt 5:28 is always my first line of defense in the battle for a clean heart.

  4. I am 2 weeks free of Porn so far, because I have made up no in my mind that I won’t be a slave to the devil no more, 67 years old and hurting, but I know that God loves me and is with me in this battle. Sex is so Beautiful the way God intended, I now am striving to be the Man God wants me to be, got a long way to go. Please Pray for me.

  5. One of the few reasons might be the skin sensitivity related dysfunction. From my own personal experience the hand stimulation masturbation combined with visual porn experience might really cause loss of sensitivity over the corpus of male genital. The overlaying skin does not go along with that much pressure after some time. And every next time you will need more force for the feeling without actually realizing it. For those over addicted to that might experience loss of sense due to increased sensitivity threshold on the skin. There has to be skin-nerve innervation related study of this case. And the psychological facts as we see above are just sad. Very important website for the information. Thanks to everyone.

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