Your Brain on Porn

Parenting the Internet Generation Ebook Cover

Watching just 5 hours of porn has been proven to significantly change people's sexual beliefs and attitudes. Find out 5 distinct ways that porn warps your brain, as well as 5 biblical ways to renew your mind and find freedom.

17 thoughts on “Daddy Looks at Porn: Can Fathers in Sexual Sin Lead Their Children?

  1. That is an excellent article well said. Thank you for that comment on Solomon. Many pastors can’t explain the multiple wives thing. I always had a problem with it. It bothered me because God is consistent in His word. And I wouldn’t want to be one of those women! I am a one man women who wants a one woman man!

    • Thanks, Esther. While polygamy wasn’t outright condemned in the Old Testament, there are some strong warnings against the multiplication of wives. Many examples of polygamy (Solomon being a prime example) are positioned in the Scriptures as warnings to those who seek our multiple wives. While I wouldn’t call polygamy a sin in the sense that it violates an express command of God, I would call it unwise. It is ironic that a man whose wisdom surpassed any of his contemporaries, a man who taught about the lure of sexual temptation, would be ensnared by so many women himself.

    • You have to remember that there are times, though FEW – but times nonetheless where God DID allow a man to have more then 1 wife. Moses and Abraham are two of these times. The BIG difference? God COMMANDED it whereas Solomon was NOT allowed/commanded.

      Another point: God commends not to kill, yet many times entire cities (Sodom, Gomorrah, Jerusalem) were destroyed. God would tell his prophet to leave the city and shortly thereafter it was destroyed.

      See the difference? He calls ALL the shots; not man.

      I’m not arguing, just pointing out a fact that I find interesting.

    • Yes, polygamy is tolerated in various times and places, and there are no direct commands in the Bible to avoid it (except possibly for elders and deacons in the New Testament). The Bible does seem to point to the idea that polygamy is unwise, and that theme can be seen in many Bible books.

  2. Thank you for this article, and for being so open and honest about your past struggles. My husband had a secret porn addiction for years, starting as a teenager, and it ended only when I actually discovered it in 2011, and everything was brought out into the open. He has been free of porn for over 2 years now and he is a far different man than who he was then. But it brought a lot of grief and pain to our marriage and our home. I have often worried about the effects this has had on our sons, particularly our oldest 2 who were old enough to understand what had happened. I pray that all of our boys will stay away from porn and sexual immorality and not fall into the vicious cycle of sin that ensnared my husband for so many years. I know there are people out there who view porn as ‘harmless’…but they are so very mislead and mistaken.

    • Hi Trish,

      I think the cycle can be broken, for sure. He can use his experiences as a great example of how God transforms hearts, teaching your children about the dangers of pornography. God is much, much bigger than your husband’s past.

  3. Thank you, Luke, for all the great articles that you’ve been sending my way. Your Covenant Eyes service is a key component of the mentoring program I’ve extablished at our church.

    Isn’t it ironic that the very man that exhorted his son to “be satisfied with the wife of his youth” (Prov. 5:18) would have multiplied wives so prolifically! Yet, one reason we know Scripture is true is that God never saw fit to whitewash the sins of its heroes, such as Abraham, Moses, David or Solomon.

    Although I agree that there is no explicit proscription against polygamy in Scripture, there are many passages that forbid it implicitly (e.g. Mt. 19:5, quoting Gen. 2:24 or, in a specific reference to kings, who would be in a position of power to acquire many wives, Deut. 17:17).

    In Christ,
    David

    • I love that Scripture doesn’t fudge the details on Solomon’s life (or anyone’s life, for that matter).

      You are correct about the polygamy thing. There is a paradigm in Scripture of one woman to one man (Adam and Eve being the first paradigm, Christ and the church being the ultimate paradigm). While God did not outright condemn polygamy (hence the prevalence of it among patriarchs, kinds, and judges), there is plenty in the Bible that deems it unwise. Polygamous marriages are legitimate marriages, however. By that I mean if I have multiple wives and am then converted to Christ, I am not called to kick all my wives (except the first one) to the curb. I’m to love and serve all of them as Christ loves the church: I have made a vow to all of them. But since the Bible deems polygamy unwise, it is right and good for the church to counsel against it and to position men who are “husband of one wife” as the primary leaders and examples of the flock.

  4. Encouraging, eye opening, hope-giving article. I have no doubt your testimony can encourage many! Keep up the good work brother! May God use you mightily to free many who fight with secret sins!

    Regi

  5. Great words Luke! I agree whole heartedly and allthough Im not a father or even husband yet, you have given me a pretty clear picture of the kind I want to be.
    God bless your work!

    In Christ,
    Cody

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