The Porn Circuit

Parenting the Internet Generation Ebook Cover

Science shows us why porn is highly addictive. Learn how our neurochemistry is easily hijacked by porn to create compulsive behaviors, and discover how the brain can be rewired to escape porn's allure.

9 thoughts on “Don Jon: Pornography, Hollywood, and a Wake-Up Call to Young Men

  1. Great post and review! As a recovering addict, I won’t be seeing this movie, but I am pleased that at least one person in Hollywood is trying to tackle the giant elephant in the room.

    I would however like to respond one thing you said: “Basic statistics means that almost all of the young men and many of the young women in that room have been exposed to pornography.” Correction: We no longer need statistics. After watching that movie, ALL the young women in that room had been exposed to pornography.

    As you pointed out, pornographic clips were used throughout the movie. In addition, there were apparently sex scenes in the movie providing an opportunity for the audience to engage in voyeurism as they watched actors in sex acts on screen.

    Porn doesn’t lose its pornographic characteristics just because it’s put to use in a “serious” movie. And porn isn’t defined merely by whether or not genitals or female nipples are in view. Sexual behavior on screen as you have described it is pornographic whether it takes place in shadows or not.

    It’s too bad that the only way Hollywood seems to be able to talk about the porn problem is by creating a movie about it that contains–more pornography.

    • Good points. Regarding the porn itself, you’re spot-on regarding the “Haven’t seen it? GUESS WHAT” issue. Personally, I’ve managed to avoid porn exposure about as well as anyone possibly could. I did have the ironic realization that the five or so minutes of actual porn shown onscreen probably came close to doubling my total lifetime exposure to porn films. By contrast, the cinematic sex scenes were remarkably tame. Given the subject matter of the film, they almost felt like a relief.

      It’s really too bad that they tend to be inescapable in movies these days. Like much sexualized content in, say, ads or magazines, sex scenes in movies have long since lost their shock value. We merely accept them as part of the story now.

  2. It is a dilemma about whether to watch movies like Don Jon or also an excellent recent depiction of the hollow-soul desperate life of a sex addict (Shame, 2011, starring Michael Fassbender). However, the directors of these movies are wise in their edits, soundtracks and frames to generally introduce “here’s lust” scenes that rapidly morph into other more real and uncomfortable feelings such as sadness/fear/loneliness associating with unmet needs of connection/intimacy/fulfillment. Viewers can discern what goes on in their heart, and if getting dark, then LEAVE or turn the movie off.

  3. Hi Wasabi Jane,

    Good article about the movie Don Jon. I struggle to slay the porn dragon so I won’t be watching this movie. I will comment on your article, though.

    I agree with your three main points. I will comment on each one.

    First, it’s not just about porn. When I’m tempted to look at porn, I’m trying to fill a void – an unmet need – in my life. This void could be physical affection, relational intimacy, or the physical desire to have sex. Some unmet need isn’t being addressed. Check!

    Second, women have no chance against porn stars. I’m ashamed at looking at porn because it influences how I look at women. Women are created in God’s image (Gen 1:26). I don’t want to view my future wife through the lens of raunchy sex videos. That’s not fair to her and certainly won’t contribute to a healthy relationship.
    If I compare my girlfriend (hypothetically speaking) to a porn star, I’m holding her up to some idealized standard. No woman wants to be compared to a porn actress. Women weren’t created as objects for our sexual gratification. As a man, I’m ashamed of the fact that I’ve created an idealized version of beauty. What the heck!
    I love articles like this because they challenge my selfishness and direct me back to the cross. Lead me to the cross where your love poured out. I come to the cross with an attitude of repentance. This leads me to the last point.

    Thirdly, I need to look at the state of my heart in order to quit porn. I need to admit that I’m a sinner, repent of my sins and turn to Christ in faith. Repentance, faith, and accountability are effective means in slaying the dragon of Internet porn. Unfortunately, many of the men who watched that movie with you Wasabi Jane probably haven’t heard about Jesus Christ and his love for us. The Breaking Free blog has written a lot on accountability already that has been helpful.
    Lastly, the sword of the spirit is a capable offensive weapon in our fight against pornography (Eph 6:12). Let’s fight like men (1 Cor 16:13). Please help us Lord to pursue sexual purity and faithfulness to you (Eph 5:3). Thanks for the article Wasabi Jane. :)

    May the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, and the love of God, and the fellowship of the Holy Spirit be with you all. 2 Corinthians 13:14 NIV

    • To Joshua Brooks, Thank you for sharing your heart. I wept as I read it knowing that my husband of 21 years has an Internet porn addiction which he denies. Of course, he has also turned his back on his faith. God bless you.

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